


Bring me home again

by shockingblue



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Carmilla AU, F/F, Hollstein - Freeform, Sexual Content, Vampire Carmilla
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2017-01-10
Packaged: 2018-09-10 17:15:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 34,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8925586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shockingblue/pseuds/shockingblue
Summary: Laura Hollis is excited to start her university experience by going on the school's mandatory camping trip. Carmilla Karnstein would rather be anywhere else.





	1. On The Road

**Author's Note:**

> I've been writing for a while but this is my first time writing a fanfic so bear with me. English isn't my first language, any comments or advice are greatly appreciated! There are a few chapters with violence and anxiety/panic attacks, there will be a trigger warning at the start of those. This fic is rated Explicit for a reason. Hope you enjoy!

It’s 7 am on a Friday morning and Laura is not so patiently waiting for her dad to finish eating his breakfast. The day of her new school’s camping trip has finally arrived and she has been looking forward to it for months. The trip is actually mandatory, it’s the introduction week for everyone who graduated from high school and wants to attend Silas university this year. Laura would still have attended if it was optional though, she has always loved camping and her three best friends are going as well. It’s like the vacation without her dad she has always wanted to go on. Don’t get Laura wrong, she loves her dad a lot. He’s just very protective and it does get a little annoying now that she’s eighteen and he still treats her as if she’s a five year old.  
  
  
Laura has had all of her stuff packed for days now, going over the list that was sent to her about twenty times to make sure she didn’t miss anything. She even bought a new tent after learning every student is expected to bring their own 1-person tent. While Laura thought it was pretty childish for them to not allow people to share a tent, her dad had very much approved of the idea. She has packed about ten hoodies, enough underwear to last her a month and she even bought two new jackets. The trip may only last one week but Laura would rather be safe than sorry, especially after she read about how cold it can get at night.  
  
  
“Dad, come on.” Laura pleads, giving him the puppy eyes that always seem to work for her. “I don’t want to be late and miss the bus or even worse, make everyone have to wait for me. Can you imagine how embarrassing that would be? Everyone would immediately hate me.”  
  
“Laura it’s just past seven in the morning!” Sherman laughs at his daughter. “The bus leaves in an hour and a half and we only have to drive for about ten minutes, you’ll be fine.”  
  
Laura looks at him with a pout, still giving him the puppy eyes as well. “Fine! Start getting your stuff inside of the car, I’ll be out in a second.” He sighs, rolling his eyes before he stands up to take his plate to the sink. Laura grins before turning around, running to the couch to get all the bags she dumped on it this week. “Oh dad, can you grab the flask with my hot cocoa from the kitchen table before you come outside? Love you!” Laura shouts before making her way outside.  
  
  
  
  
Laura is standing next to the bus with a big C written on a board hanging in front of the window. All the new students are divided into five groups, every group having a teacher escorting them. Laura just found out two of her best friends, Perry and Lafontaine, are in her group as well. She’s really happy about not being separated from her friends, though she does feel a little bad for Danny who did get placed into another group. Laura has already loaded all of her stuff into the bus so now she and the rest of her group are just waiting until everyone has arrived.  
  
“Guys, it’s only ten more minutes until we are supposed to leave and one person still isn’t here.” Lafontaine says. They are one of Laura’s closest friends, practically being neighbours and going to the same schools growing up will do that to you. Lafontaine even lived with Laura and her dad for a while right after they came out as non-binary, their parents didn’t take it very well but they came around and accepted their child as they are eventually. “Do you think we could ask Mr. Rogers to put Danny in our group if the last person doesn’t show up? I mean I guess it wouldn’t matter whether she’s in group C or D then, right?”  
  
Laura smiles at that. “Yes! Honestly I can’t believe they put her with strangers. I’m so glad that’s not me..” She says, making a face before hearing Perry next to her clear her throat. She turns around only to be met with an awkward smiling Danny. Laura’s face falls. “I’m sorry Danny. I didn’t mean to-” Danny laughs, cutting Laura off. “It’s fine, Hollis! Honestly you’re absolutely right. I’m so pissed.” Danny shrugs before turning to Lafontaine, “I did just hear your plan and I’m in! Let’s pray that last person doesn’t show up, whoever it is.”  
  
  
  
  
It’s 8.25am, five minutes before they are supposed to leave, and Laura and her friends have just asked their question to Mr. Rogers. “Already plotting, I see.” Mr. Rogers laughs at them before continuing, “I suppose we could arrange that, but only if the last person doesn’t show up in the next five minutes.” Laura and her friends already start a little celebration, about to go and get Danny’s stuff out of the other bus when Mr. Rogers clears his throat.

“Girls..” Lafontaine clears their throat. “Sorry, Lafontaine.” He gives them a light pat on the shoulder before awkwardly continuing. “Anyway, I’m afraid your plan won’t work out after all.” He points behind the group of friends. “Seems like Carmilla has decided to grace us with her presence after all.” _Wait.. Carmilla as in-_ Laura quickly turns around only to find out that yes, it is indeed the Carmilla she was thinking of.  
  
Carmilla had been a new student at the start of Laura’s final year in high school. She and her friends quickly decided to befriend her after noticing she was always sitting alone. Worst decision ever. If looks could have murdered, they would all have died that day. Carmilla hadn’t even acknowledged their existence, really. She had given them all a murderous look, taken a cookie out of the package in Laura’s hand before blowing out her cigarette smoke in their faces and walking straight through them. They never tried again.  
  
Laura’s thoughts get interrupted when her friends start pleading with Mr. Rogers. “Guys, come on. I really don’t know what to tell you. Carmilla was placed in group C, Danny was not.” He looks around, four pouting students looking back at him. “I guess we could switch if Carmilla agrees, but that’s the only way I’m going to be able to help you.” Laura shares a uncertain look with Perry before following Danny who has already started walking towards Carmilla.  
  
  
Carmilla looks like she’s having a fight with the huge duffle bag she’s carrying, trying to hold it up with one arm while holding a cigarette, wallet and her phone in the other. She finally gives up and ends up just dragging the duffle back behind her when she’s suddenly surrounded by gingers. Laura is standing behind her three friends, wanting to support them but also being a little intimidated by Carmilla.

Carmilla shoves her sunglasses on top of her head before glaring at the three gingers in front of her. “Any reason I’m surrounded by the ginger squad at this lovely hour?” She growls, taking a drag from her cigarette before throwing it on the ground, right in front of Danny’s feet. Danny lets out an angry sigh before getting an elbow in the side from Perry. “Listen, Karnstein. I’m sure you wouldn’t mind if they switched you for me so I can be in group C with my friends? You know, since you don’t have any anyway.” She snorts before being pushed aside by Laura who has finally found the courage to get out from hiding behind the tall redhead.

“Seriously, Danny?” Laura whispers, sounding a little annoyed. “You really thought that was the best tactic to get what we want?” Danny sighs, putting her arm around Laura’s shoulder. “Sorry, Hollis. I couldn’t help it.”  
  
Carmilla locks her eyes with Laura’s for a second, obviously only just realizing she was there, before letting out a loud sigh. “As much as it pains me to stand in the way of true love,” she looks between Laura and Danny, rolling her eyes before continuing, “I don’t think so.” She puts her sunglasses back in front of her eyes and walks straight through the group of friends.  
  
“Seriously, what a bitch. No wonder no one likes her.” Danny says, making sure the last part is loud enough for Carmilla to hear it. Carmilla doesn’t even react other than putting her middle finger up over her shoulder while walking over towards mr Rogers, still dragging her duffle back behind her. Laura can’t help but look at her walking away, letting her eyes roam over those leather pants for a second before realizing what she’s doing and quickly turning around. “Well, I guess we’ll have to say goodbye for now, the bus is about to leave.” Perry says.

 

They all hug Danny goodbye and quickly run towards their parents to say their goodbyes to them as well. “Let’s sit at the back of the bus, so none of us have to sit alone.” Perry says, gently pushing Laura and Lafontaine towards the bus where Mr. Rogers is not so patiently waiting. Laura walks into the bus, right behind Perry and Lafontaine, before slamming right into the latter. “Lafontaine, what the?” Laura shrieks, readjusting the straps of her backpack. Lafontaine turns around. “Oops, my bad. It’s just, someone is already sitting at the back.” Laura sighs. “So? There are five seats in the back so as long as there’s still three spots left I don’t understand why we’re still standing here.”  
  
“Laura is right, Lafontaine. Just because Carmilla is sitting in the back doesn’t mean no one is allowed to sit on any of the seats around her.” Perry says, starting to walk again while dragging Lafontaine with her. _Wait what?_ Laura thinks. _No one said anything about Carmilla being the one seated there.._ But before she can finish that thought and offer to be the one sitting on her own, her friends are already walking towards the back. Laura takes a deep breath before following behind them.

 

Perry sits down on the left side right next to the window, Lafontaine next to her. Laura takes a seat next to Lafontaine, only leaving one empty seat between her and a very annoyed looking Carmilla. Laura swallows before quickly taking her eyes off of Carmilla and starts staring at her hands instead. Carmilla has her earbuds in, though Laura is not exactly sure why she even bothers since her music is playing so loud even Laura can hear it clearly.  
  
“Alright students, listen up!” Mr. Rogers’ voice takes over the bus. He’s sitting on a seat at the front of the bus, talking into a microphone while holding a list in front of him. “We just left a little later than we planned since some people apparently don’t understand what 8.30am sharp means.” Laura takes a quick look to her left, only to see Carmilla not only still has music blazing in her ears, she has also started to read some very old looking book. Laura can’t help rolling her eyes before looking back to the front of the bus.  
  
“Anyway, this will be an eight hour drive, so I hope you all brought something to keep yourselves occupied with. We will stop once every three hours, but don’t worry, there’s also a toilet on this bus!” A few students let out some relieved noises so he waits a minute before he continues. “Today will mostly be about getting to the forest where we will start our camping trip, so any details about the activities will be shared tomorrow. For today we only have a little quest planned for tonight after we get settled. You’re going to have to pair up for that, you can either choose someone to pair up with or just write your own name down and we will pair you up.” Laura looks to the right and immediately notices the worried look on Perry’s face. She smiles. “Don’t worry, Per. I know how you feel about the dark, it’s okay if you pair up with Lafontaine. I’ll just let Mr. Rogers pair me up with someone, it’s fine.” She playfully shoves Lafontaine and smiles at them.  
  
  
  
  
They are about two hours into the bus ride when a pencil and a paper is handed to Laura. She can already see a few pairs written down but it’s mostly just single names. _Well, at least I’m not the only one who will be paired up with a stranger._ She writes her name on the list and turns to hand the paper to Carmilla. She holds it out in front of her but there’s no reaction. “Ca-” Laura clears her throat. “Carmilla?”  
  
Laura is about to get angry when she notices the way Carmilla’s chest is rising and falling. _Wait.. she’s asleep?_ Laura takes a deep breath before lightly shaking Carmilla’s shoulder. Still no reaction. She shakes her shoulder a little harder this time. Carmilla suddenly flinches, immediately taking off her sunglasses and sitting up straight. Her eyes are wide for a second before her entire face quickly turns back into her usual broody expression. “What?” she groans.  
  
“Sorry.” Laura squeaks. “I didn’t mean to wake you up, I mean I didn’t even know you were sleeping-” Laura quickly stops herself before she goes on one of her rambles. “You just need to write down your name on this paper.”  
  
“Why?” Carmilla asks, the look on her face clearly stating she has no idea what Laura is talking about.  
  
_Seriously?_ “Seriously?” Laura asks, feeling herself getting annoyed with the brunette. “Maybe if you paid attention for once you would have actually heard anything Mr. Rogers has told us..” Laura sighs. “Anyway, it’s for the quest we’re doing tonight. They want to pair us up so you either have to write down your name with someone else’s or just your name if you want the teachers to pair you up.”  
  
“I see..” Carmilla says, dragging her eyes over the paper. “I see the ginger squad has decided to kick you out.” She smirks at the annoyed look taking over Laura’s features.  
  
“No they didn’t.” Laura whispers, trying to keep her anger under control. “Perry just.. doesn’t like the dark. So I told them they could go together, it’s fine.”  
  
“You could pair up with me, you know.” Carmilla says, raising an eyebrow at the shocked expression taking over Laura’s face.

Laura can feel her eyes widen before she quickly schools her face back to normal. “Yeah sure. And then end up having to go alone because you decide to show up 30 minutes late or not at all?” Laura rolls her eyes. “I don’t think so.”  
  
“Whatever, suit yourself.” Carmilla groans, quickly writing her name down before tossing the paper back to her. Before Laura can even react, Carmilla’s earbuds are already placed back into her ears and her sunglasses are covering her brown eyes again. _Was that too mean? I mean there’s no way she actually meant it right?_ Laura asks herself before shaking her thoughts away and walking to the front of the bus to give the paper back to Mr. Rogers.  
  
  
  
  
Laura is about to fall asleep when she is startled by Mr. Rogers’ voice blaring through the microphone. She groans, opening her eyes to look at the front of the bus. “We are about to make our first stop at a tank station, it’s your own choice whether you go outside or not. Please remember our next stop won’t be for another three hours. We will stop here for 30 minutes so please be back at the bus or we will leave without you.” He laughs at his own joke before continuing. “Before you go, please stay seated so I can tell you who we paired up with who.” Laura starts putting her jacket on and taking her wallet out of her backpack while listening to the names Mr. Rogers is reading out.

“Theo and Kirsch.. Carmilla and Laura..”  
  
Laura’s eyes widen while she turns her head towards an already smirking Carmilla. Laura opens her mouth and closes it again, not really knowing what to say. “Guess you’re stuck with me, cupcake.” Carmilla says, eyebrow raised. Before Laura can think of anything to say to that, Carmilla is out of her seat and walking towards the front.  
  
_Seriously?  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This first chapter is probably one of the shortest and also the weakest in my opinion. I think I've fallen in love with this fic and it's roughly finished already, so no worries, I won't abandon it. Please let me know what you think. I don't have a co-author or a beta so please feel free to point out any mistakes I've made.


	2. It Never Ends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: There's a panic attack in this chapter.

It’s just after 6 pm when Laura finally finishes setting up her tent. Or more accurately, finishes watching Lafontaine setting up her tent. She tried to do it herself but finally gave up after 30 minutes of being hit in the face by her own tent. The worst part wasn’t even that she couldn’t get it up herself but the amused looks she was getting from Carmilla who had somehow put her own tent up within five minutes, a few feet away from her own. She had been sitting next to it, earbuds in her ears and smoking a cigarette. Snorting every time Laura tried, and failed, to set up her tent.  
  
  
The tents are being put up on the side of a field of grass, right next to the edge of the forest and about 60 feet away from the cabin with bathrooms and showers. Carmilla’s tent is set up on the far right, clearly as far away from the group as she was allowed.  
  
  
“There you go, Frosh.” Lafontaine laughs at Laura, patting her on the back before making their way over towards their own tent. “Thanks, Laf!” Laura starts getting her stuff out of her bag and into her tent, sending one last annoyed look Carmilla’s way before making her way inside. _This is actually pretty comfy, thank god for the way too expensive air mattress Dad bought me._ The group was told they could spend their time the way they wanted until the quest that starts at ten. Laura already ate dinner on the bus so she decides to take a shower, feeling way too sweaty after spending eight hours on that bus.  
  
  
  
  
It’s just before ten pm and Laura, Perry and Lafontaine are playing charades. It’s Laura’s turn and she’s just about to start when she gets interrupted by Mr. Rogers who is asking all of the students to gather around the fire place. Laura narrows her eyes at the huge smile on Lafontaine’s face. “Don’t think you’ve won yet, this game is not finished!” Laura laughs before she and Lafontaine are pretty much dragged to the fire place by Perry.  
  
“Alright students. I know it’s been a long day but you’re all young and healthy so don’t think anyone will get to complain their way out of doing this quest.” Mr. Rogers laughs at a few students groaning at his announcement before he continues. “Each pair will get a map of the forest and a paper with the assignments on them. Every list will follow a different route, so don’t think you can just follow someone else.” _Great, so I’m completely stuck with Carmilla then._ “The first pair to get back here will get a small prize, everyone else’s prize will be my permission to finally go get some beauty sleep. Any questions?” Laura looks around for Carmilla, not seeing her anywhere. _I swear to god if she bailed on me already.._ “Alright, great! Come get your papers and off you go.”

  
Everyone runs towards Mr. Rogers to collect their assignments while Laura keeps looking around for Carmilla. She’s about to go complain to Mr. Rogers when she finally sees Carmilla slowly, like really slowly, making her way towards the fire place. “How nice of you to finally grace me with your presence.” Laura rolls her eyes, quickly making her way to collect their map and assignments. “Okay so I was thinking if one of us holds the map and the other one reads the assignments we will probably be able to do this the fastest we can. I was also thinking if we-” She’s cut off by a loud groan from Carmilla, followed by her snatching the map out of Laura’s hand. “Fucking hell, cupcake.” She puts the map in the back pocket of her leather pants before continuing. “It’s just some stupid quest they came up with to get rid of us for a while and it’s not like there’s a thousand dollar prize or something. Calm down.”  
  
Laura opens her mouth before thinking better of it and closing it again. _Arguing will only make this take even longer. And besides, she won’t care what I have to say anyway._ “Let’s just go.” She starts walking towards the woods, looking over her shoulder after taking a couple of steps and being slightly surprised when she sees Carmilla is actually following her.  
  
  
  
  
They have just completed their first task, which turned out to be surprisingly easy. “Well, if everything we will have to do is as boring as that puzzle we just had to solve, I might actually fall asleep right in this forest.” Carmilla sighs way louder than necessary, writing down their answer before they continue to walk. “Do you always have to complain about everything?” Carmilla raises an eyebrow at her. “Today is literally the first time you have ever talked to me, cutie.” She takes her black jacket off and ties it around her waist. “Don’t act like you know anything about me.”  
  
Laura swallows before deciding she’s not going to let Carmilla intimidate her this time. “You’re right, I don’t know you. I’m just saying, coming across like you hate everything won’t make you a lot of friends.” Carmilla’s face hardens at that. “Do I strike you as the type of person who plays well with others?” She scoffs. “I don’t want any friends and I especially don’t plan on making any on this dumb camping trip. Now can we please continue?”  
  
  
  
Laura and Carmilla are at their fourth task when they encounter a slight problem. The envelope that holds their assignment is hanging halfway up a tree, both girls way too small to reach it. “Seriously? Who the hell is that tall.” Carmilla rolls her eyes, looking up at the envelope. “Except for that ridiculously tall ginger girlfriend of yours, that is. Too bad she’s not here.” Carmilla smirks. Laura narrows her eyes at her before jumping to try and catch the envelope even though she knows she won't even come close to reaching it. “She’s not my girlfriend.” She huffs.  
  
“Could have fooled me.” Carmilla raises her eyebrow. “You know she’s into you right? I mean have you seen the way she looks at you?” Carmilla laughs to herself. “Or maybe you haven’t, since she’s all the way up there.” She snorts.

“Seriously? Are we going to stand here and talk about my love life or are we going to come up with a way to get that damn envelope?” Carmilla smirks at that. “Look at you, cupcake. Swearing and all, I’m rubbing off on you already.” She walks towards the tree before looking back at Laura. “Put your legs around my head.”

“What?” Laura squeaks. Carmilla rolls her eyes. “You can sit on my shoulders so you can reach the envelope. Or did you want to stay here all night?” Laura can feel a blush creep up on her face. She looks at the envelope and back at Carmilla, frowning slightly. “I’m stronger than I look, cupcake.” She smirks. “Besides, girls put their legs around my head all the time.” Laura almost chokes on her own saliva at that.  
  
Carmilla squats so Laura can sit on her shoulders, grabbing the sides of her legs before slowly getting back to a standing position. “Can you reach it?” Laura stretches her arms all the way above her, still missing a few inches. “Almost. If only my fingers were a little longer..” Carmilla smirks. “Now that’s a thought I’ve never had.” Laura scoffs. ‘’Seriously?’’  


She’s about to demand Carmilla to set her back down when she suddenly feels two hands on her ass. “What are you doing?” she breathes. “Relax, cupcake. I’m going to push you up a little so you can get the envelope.” She sounds a little too out of breath for the few seconds she’s been holding Laura up. _Is she faking being out of breath right now? I’m not even that heavy._ “You better do it quickly, before I collapse and we both end up on the ground.”  
  
  
This time Laura can easily reach the envelope, still feeling the warmth of Carmilla’s hands on her ass after she’s already been put back on solid ground. She blushes before quickly opening the envelope and reading the assignment. “Draw a picture of the tree this envelope was hanging from. Seriously? I didn’t know we were on an art course?” Laura sighs while taking the pencil out of the envelope. “I’ll do it.” Carmilla says, grabbing the pencil from Laura. “You can draw?” Laura frowns. “Would I volunteer to do it if I couldn’t?”  
  
  
Laura watches Carmilla while she’s quickly drawing the tree, the tip of her tongue sticking out of her mouth in concentration. She looks like a whole other person and it’s making Laura wonder what the real Carmilla is like. _Maybe she’s not as bad as she seems to be. This whole quest thing hasn’t been that bad so far._ Laura lets her eyes travel over her features, lingering a little on the tongue sticking out before she quickly averts her eyes towards the drawing. _Wow.. that’s actually beautiful. She wasn’t kidding when she said she could draw._

“Done” Carmilla says, tossing the pencil back towards Laura before folding the drawing and sticking it into her back pocket. “You’re talented.” Laura says, blushing a little when she realizes she’s said that out loud. A small smile takes over Carmilla’s mouth before it quickly turns into her usual smirk. “I have many talents, cupcake.” She winks before walking towards their next assignment. Laura rolls her eyes before following her, smiling to herself.  
  
  
  
  
It’s just after 2 am when Laura abruptly wakes up from the recurring nightmare she’s been having for years. She closes her eyes and tries to slower her breathing, desperate to avoid going into a full blown panic attack right now. _Breathe in… breathe out… it’s just a dream._ It takes a few minutes before she can feel herself getting a little calmer again. She gets out of her tent to walk towards the bathroom, feeling desperate for some cold water on her face.  
  
When she gets inside she can hear one of the showers running. _Weird.. who takes a shower at two in the morning?_ But she immediately shakes the thought, not really having the energy to care at the moment. She stands in front of the sink, resting her hands on it while looking at herself in the mirror. She closes her eyes when the images of her nightmare come flooding back to her, trying to get herself to breathe in a normal pattern again. _Great job, Hollis. You could have known there’s no way for a panic attack to go away that easily._

Laura lets herself sink to the ground, bending forward and breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth like she learned at therapy. She’s just starting to feel herself calm down again when she suddenly feels a hand on her shoulder. She shrieks, closing her eyes even tighter while she can feel her heart beating out of her chest. She can hear someone talk but it sounds like the voice is miles away. She tries to calm her breathing but ends up hyperventilating anyway. Suddenly there are two arms wrapping around her from behind, lightly rocking her from left to right while a calm voice talks into her ear. “Cupcake, it’s me. Calm down. You’re okay.” _Carmilla?_  
  
  
  
Laura has no idea how long they’re sitting like that. It could be minutes, it could also be hours. She focuses on Carmilla’s voice in her ear and the strong arms around her, finally feeling herself calm down again. “You’re okay, you’re safe. Deep breaths cupcake, you’re okay.” Laura finally relaxes into Carmilla’s embrace, hearing a relieved sigh coming from behind her. “Tell me if you want me to let go of you.” Laura sighs. “This is good.” She clears her throat. “Thank you.”  
  
They sit like that for a few more minutes before Laura turns around, facing Carmilla. “I’m sorry about that.” She blushes. “You didn’t have to do that, you don’t even like me. Thank you.” Carmilla slightly frowns at that. “It’s fine, I’m glad I was here.” Laura looks up at Carmilla, giving her a small smile. “Why were you here anyway? It’s the middle of the night.” Carmilla gives her a small smile in return, shrugging. “I was taking a shower. Didn’t feel like having to share the showers with all those lackwits tomorrow morning.” Laura playfully rolls her eyes at that before lightly bumping Carmilla’s shoulder.  
  
“How did you know what to do anyway? I mean I’m really glad you did, it’s just people usually freak out and make it even worse.” Carmilla combs her fingers through her wet hair, averting her gaze towards the ground. “My brother used to suffer from panic attacks.”  
  
“When you say used to, does that mean he doesn’t suffer from them anymore?” Laura asks, sounding hopeful. Carmilla swallows before locking her eyes with Laura’s. “He died.” Laura’s eyes widen. “I’m sure yours will go away eventually though. I guess William just died before they did.” Laura gives her a sad smile. “So, any reason you were having a panic attack in the bathroom at two in the morning?” Carmilla asks, trying to lighten the mood a little.  
  
Laura swallows. _She just told me something very personal, I might as well trust her with something in return._ “It’s my mom. She got shot in front of me a few years ago, died shortly after that.” Laura quickly wipes a stray tear away. “I still have nightmares about it sometimes.” Carmilla places her hand on Laura’s shoulder for a few seconds, giving her an encouraging squeeze. “I’m sorry.” She gives Laura a sad smile. “My parents died in front of me as well.” Laura’s eyes widen before she surges forward, pulling Carmilla into a tight hug. Carmilla freezes for a second before slowly putting her arms around Laura’s waist, returning the hug. “I’m sorry.” Laura whispers into her ear. Carmilla tightens her arms around Laura. “It’s okay, cupcake. It happened a long time ago.”  
  
They smile at each other when they pull back from the hug. Carmilla stands up, holding her hand out for Laura. “Let’s go get some sleep, I’m sure they have lots of idiotic activities planned for us tomorrow.” Laura takes her hand, pulling herself up. They walk towards their tents, the fact that they’re still holding hands not going unnoticed by Laura.  
  
“So, will you be back to your broody self tomorrow?” Laura grins.  
  
“Definitely.” Carmilla grins back. “Good night, cupcake.”  
  
“Good night, Carm.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suffer from panic attacks myself so I have used my own experiences with it for this chapter. It's hard to get that feeling across with words so I hope it was okay.  
> Please let me know what you think! Advice and comments are greatly appreciated.


	3. Undisclosed Desires

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Sexual Content

Laura has been trying to come up with ways to talk to Carmilla again all day. She really surprised her last night and it had only made her even more intrigued by the girl. The Carmilla she talked to last night was so completely different from the one she usually saw walking around school. Laura just desperately wanted to talk to last night's Carmilla again. The odds were not in her favour, however. Today had been filled with activities that made it impossible to even attempt starting a conversation. First they went on a morning hike, which had seemed like a good opportunity until Laura found out they were split into two seperate groups. She could have talked to her during lunch but the nerves got the better of her and Lafontaine already dragged her towards their tent anyway. Then after lunch they went horse riding. Laura loved horse riding but apparently Carmilla did not because she didn’t see her anywhere and figured she must have convinced Mr. Rogers to let her stay behind at the campsite.   
  
  
It’s currently dinner time and Laura is sitting next to Perry and Lafontaine around the campfire. Carmilla is sitting on her own, as usual, on the opposite side of her. Lafontaine is telling a story about the time they got stuck inside of an elevator and Laura honestly couldn’t be less interested if she tried. She loves her friends and she’s usually all ears when Lafontaine is telling one of their crazy stories but today she just can’t focus on anything other than Carmilla. She glances towards her for what feels like the hundredth time today, only this time Carmilla is already staring at her. Laura gives her a small smile before quickly averting her eyes towards the ground. _Why does this girl make me so nervous? You need to girl the hell up, Hollis! Just go talk to her already._ Laura takes a deep breath before telling her friends she’ll be right back. She takes her plate and makes her way towards the other side of the campfire.

 

“Hey.” Laura says, sitting down next to Carmilla and putting her plate on her lap again.  
  
“Hey, cutie.” Carmilla puts the last piece of her bread into her mouth, finishing it before facing Laura. “Any reason you’re sitting next to me instead of the ginger squad over there?”  
  
Laura stares at her plate, shoving food around with her fork. “I don’t know. I guess I just wanted to talk to you.” She looks up at Carmilla. “I really liked talking to you last night.”  
  
Carmilla gives her a small smile. “Me too, cupcake.”  
  
Laura beams at that. “Tonight is movie night. They’re giving us one iPad per two students since, you know, we don’t really have access to a television around here.” Laura can feel a light blush creep up on her face. “So.. I was wondering if maybe you wanted to pair up with me again? I mean if you didn’t pair up with someone else already.”  
  
Carmilla chuckles, lightly nudging Laura’s shoulder. “In case you hadn’t noticed yet, I don’t have many friends around here.” Laura shrugs her shoulders, playfully rolling her eyes at the brunette. “I planned on just ditching the entire movie thing, but I guess watching a movie with you wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.”

  
  
  
It’s just after 8 pm and the students are gathered around Mr. Rogers who is handing out the iPads. “Here you go. And before you guys start getting ideas about going on facebook and all that other crap you kids do these days, it’s not going to happen. There’s no Wi-Fi around here so don’t waste your time.” Lafontaine raises an eyebrow and grins at Laura, obviously already having cooked up a plan to get their iPad connected to the internet. Laura laughs at them before getting her iPad. She noticed Carmilla didn’t come outside when Mr. Rogers called for the students to gather around so she decided she’ll just take the iPad to her tent.  
  
  
She stands outside of Carmilla’s tent, not really sure what to do. _You can’t really knock on a tent like you would usually knock on a door.. Should I just get inside? But what if she’s getting dressed or what if.._ Laura’s thoughts get cut off by laughter coming from inside of the tent. “You going to stand there all night or are you actually coming in?”  
  
Laura blushes, opening the tent. “I don’t know, I guess I just didn’t want to be rude or something.” She rolls her eyes at the smirk on Carmilla’s face.

Laura sits down and her eyes immediately widen. “You don’t have a mattress?” she asks, her voice coming out louder than she intended.

“Say that a little louder so the entire campsite can hear it, cupcake.” Carmilla says, rolling her eyes.

“I’m sorry.” Laura whispers, feeling a blush creeping up her neck again. “I just can’t believe you don’t have an air mattress, there’s no way you’re comfortable like this.”  
  
Carmilla chuckles. “It’s not that bad. I mean it’s not great either but I didn’t feel like spending my hard earned money on something I was only going to use this week.”  
  
Laura swears she can see a slight blush spreading across Carmilla’s cheeks. _Cute._ “Well, that makes sense. There’s no way we’re having a movie night without a comfy mattress though. Come on.” She grabs Carmilla’s hand and drags her out of the tent before she can protest.  
  
“Cupcake, calm down.” Carmilla groans, pulling on Laura’s hand to make her slower her pace. “My muscles are a little sore. No mattress, remember?”  
  
Laura blushes. “Sorry.”  
  
  
Laura makes her way inside of her tent, getting herself comfortable under her covers before noticing Carmilla is still standing outside. She chuckles before mimicking Carmilla. “You going to stand there all night or are you actually coming in?”  
  
Carmilla rolls her eyes, getting inside of the tent and closing it up behind her. She gets under the covers next to Laura, their sides pressed together since both the mattress and the tent are only meant for one person.  
  
Laura smiles at her before turning the iPad on and scrolling through the movies that are on it. “Any preference?”  
  
“You can choose whatever you want, cupcake.” Carmilla takes a quick look at the iPad. “It’s not like there’s anything that I like on there anyway.”

“I think we should watch something really bad, like Twilight or something.” Laura says, laughing at the amused look taking over Carmilla’s features. “What? Don’t tell my you’re secretly a huge Twilight fan and I just offended you?”  
  
Carmilla rolls her eyes. “You really think that low of me, cupcake?” She grins. “Just a little inside joke, that’s all.”  
  
“I’m guessing you’re not going to tell me?”  
  
“Nope.”  
  
Laura rolls her eyes, clicking play on the first Twilight movie before putting the iPad in between them so it’s resting on their upper legs.   
  
“So, are you team Edward or team Jacob?” Carmilla asks, snorting at the offended look taking over Laura’s face.  
  
“If anything, I’m team Bella, thank you very much.” Laura says, sticking her tongue out.

“So you are into girls then?” Carmilla looks at her like she’s having an inner debate. “Yet you told me the freakishly tall ginger is not your girlfriend. In fact, I’ve never seen you dating anyone.”

Laura rolls her eyes. “Just because I’m a lesbian doesn’t mean I’m into every girl that’s into me, Carmilla.” She blushes. “She’s just.. not my type.”  
  
Carmilla locks her eyes with Laura’s, chuckling at the uncomfortable look on the girl’s face. “So, what is your type then?”  
  
Laura feels her face turning into a darker shade of red and averts her gaze towards the iPad. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” She says, the words coming out way less confident than she intended.  
  
She hears Carmilla taking in a deep breath before feeling firm fingers softly grabbing her chin, turning her face upwards so her eyes are locked with Carmilla’s again. “I would, actually.” Carmilla whispers before slowly moving forward, softly pressing their lips together. She pulls away after a few seconds, her eyes searching Laura’s widened ones.

Laura’s mouth opens and closes a few times, wanting to say something but not being able to get any words out. “You okay there, cupcake?” Carmilla raises an eyebrow, her thumb softly caressing Laura’s bottom lip. “It sounds like your heart is about to beat out of your chest.”  
  
Laura lets out a groan, locking her eyes with Carmilla’s again. “Shut up.” She breathes, grabbing Carmilla’s face with both of her hands and harshly pulling it towards her own again. Their lips meet again, much firmer this time. Carmilla lightly bites Laura’s bottom lip, sucking on it before letting it go with a pop. Laura softly whimpers, the tip of her tongue tracing Carmilla’s bottom lip. Carmilla immediately opens her mouth a little, meeting Laura’s tongue with her own. Laura feels warm heat spreading across her body. She moves the iPad away from the matress with her right hand, left hand still tangled in Carmilla’s hair. Carmilla’s hand finds the back of Laura’s head, lightly pulling on her hair before pressing her lips harder against Laura’s.   
  
Laura lets out an actual moan at that. She moves her left leg over Carmilla's so she’s straddling the brunette and quickly connects their lips again. Carmilla’s arms circle around the girl’s waist, pulling them even tighter together. Carmilla licks into Laura’s mouth, the tip of her tongue tracing over the roof of the girl’s mouth before sucking on her bottom lip again. She grabs Laura’s hands, moving them underneath her own shirt before firmly grabbing the girl’s ass.  
  
Laura’s breathing is already starting to get ragged, her hands slowly tracing over the brunette’s stomach before lightly digging her nails into her sides. Carmilla lets out a moan at that, her hands roaming from her ass to the back of her thighs and back up again. Laura’s mouth moves from Carmilla’s lips to her neck, placing wet open mouthed kisses all over her throat before softly nibbling on her jaw line. Carmilla lets out a loud groan when Laura starts sucking on her pulse point. She rolls them over so quick it makes Laura wonder if that should even be humanly possible. She’s quickly dragged away from her thoughts, however, when Carmilla starts kissing and nibbling all the way from her throat towards her chest.  
  
Carmilla tugs at the hem of her shirt when Laura’s hands cover hers, stopping her in the process. “Carmilla,” she breathes, clearing her throat before continuing. “Wait.” Carmilla immediately stops her movements. She sits up, still straddling Laura, widened eyes finding Laura’s. This is the first time Laura actually notices how completely blown the girl’s pupils are and she’s pretty sure her own look the exact same way. “Shit.” Carmilla breathes. “Am I going too fast? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” She’s cut off by Laura sitting up and her lips pressing a few light kisses on her own.   
  
Laura exhales, smiling at the brunette’s widened eyes. “It’s okay, Carm.” She laughs at Carmilla’s unconvinced expression. “Really.” She traces her thumb over the girl’s bottom lip. “It’s just.. well I haven’t..” Laura has to clear her throat again, her voice sounding way too hoarse. “I’ve just never done this before, okay. I mean I have kissed girls before but I’ve never.. you know.” She looks down, too embarrassed to meet Carmilla’s eyes.  
  
Carmilla’s firm fingers find Laura’s chin again, pulling her face slightly upwards so their eyes are locked. “You’re a virgin?” she breathes, her face a perfect combination of amusement and confusion. “Are you sure you want to do this then?” Her faces turns completely serious at that. “I really don’t want you to feel like you have to do this in any way, Laura. You can tell me if you’re not ready, I’m serious.”  
  
Laura smiles up at the brunette. “I want to.” She can feel the familiar annoying blush taking over her entire face again. “I just.. I’m not sure what to do, you know? I mean I’ve read about this in fanfictions and stuff. I’m just afraid I won’t do the right things. What if I am really bad at it? You seem like you know exactly what you’re doing and I’m just..” She swallows. “Well, I don’t know what I’m doing. Or what I’m supposed to be doing. Obviously I have an idea of what I'm supposed to be doing but what if I make it incredibly awkward or what if you-”  
  
Carmilla cuts her off by placing a few firm kisses on her lips, lightly tracing the tip of her tongue over her bottom lip before lingering right in front of Laura’s face. “Cupcake..” she whispers, eyes traveling from her mouth back up to meet her eyes. “You’re rambling.” She smiles. “Just do whatever you feel like doing, I’ll be right here to guide you through it.” She wiggles her eyebrows before her expression turns serious again. “But I’m serious, Laura. Only do this if you are a hundred percent sure you want to.”  
  
Both of Laura’s hands find Carmilla’s face again. “Believe me, I want to.” She whispers, pulling Carmilla’s head towards her own and closing the gap between their lips again. Laura lays back down, puling Carmilla down with her. Both of their mouths immediately open again, tongues instantly finding each other. Carmilla rolls them over so Laura is laying on top again and Laura’s hands immediately make their way back underneath Carmilla’s shirt, lingering on her stomach. Carmilla’s hands cover Laura’s, slowly bringing her hands up until they are cupping her own breasts. Laura’s eyes widen for a second when she realizes Carmilla isn’t wearing a bra before she slowly starts kneading her breasts, tentatively flicking the brunette’s nipples. Carmilla lets out a soft moan and starts sucking on the girl’s pulse point again, hands moving back to grab her ass.

 

“Ladies..” Mr. Rogers' loud voice suddenly sounds from outside of their tent. “It’s time to go to sleep, can I have the iPad back please?” Carmilla and Laura share a wide eyed look, panic written all over their faces. Laura covers Carmilla’s entire body with the blankets before quickly combing her fingers through her hair and opening her tent.

“Hey, Mr. Rogers.” Laura clears her throat when she realizes how hoarse her voice sounds. “Carmilla went back to her own tent already, she wasn’t really into the movie. You know how she is.” She gives him an innocent smile. She grabs the iPad, turning it off before handing it to her teacher. “She’s probably already asleep, she left my tent about an hour ago.” Mr. Rogers takes the iPad from her, a pitiful smile on his face. “Alright, I’ll just let her majesty sleep then. Good night!”  
  
Laura quickly closes her tent again, letting out a relieved sigh before turning around. She pulls the blanket off of Carmilla and her eyes immediately widen at the sight. Carmilla is lying on her back, completely naked. Laura feels heat spreading all over her body again, her eyes roaming over the girl’s naked body. _God, she’s beautiful._ Carmilla smirks, biting her lip and signalling for Laura to come back with a come hither motion.  
  
Laura shudders at the sight before she gets an idea to get back at Carmilla. She smirks, keeping her eyes locked on Carmilla’s while slowly lifting her own shirt over her head. Carmilla’s smirk is completely gone at that, replaced by hungry eyes, mouth hanging half open. Laura unbuttons her jeans, taking them off slightly less sexy than she intended. _Stupid tent.. how is anyone supposed to look sexy stripping down when you can’t even stand up._ Carmilla looks like it doesn’t hinder her at all, though. Laura can’t remember anyone ever looking at her the way she’s looking at her right now and it makes her feel both proud and incredibly nervous. She stares at a still very naked Carmilla, now only wearing a red bra and panties herself.  
  
“Cupcake, if you don’t get your butt over here right now..” Carmilla says, her voice sounding lower than Laura has ever heard it before. She slowly crawls towards Carmilla, a fluttering feeling traveling through her stomach. Carmilla grabs her face as soon as she is in reaching distance, crashing their mouths back together before grabbing Laura’s ass and pushing them flush together.   
  
Carmilla places one of her legs between Laura’s and she immediately moans when the brunette starts slowly rocking Laura against her upper thigh. “You’re so beautiful, Laura.” She whispers into her ear, placing a soft kiss right underneath her ear before sucking on her pulse point again. Laura harshly grabs her chin and reconnects their lips, licking into Carmilla’s mouth and nibbling on her bottom lip. Carmilla whimpers, grinding her pelvis up into Laura’s leg. Laura starts slowly moving her hips on her own, feeling her own wetness already soaking through her panties. Laura moves her hips back up a little, feeling slightly embarrassed about rubbing her arousal all over the brunette’s leg. Firm hands immediately land on her ass and pull her back down and Laura has to hold back a whimper when she looks back into Carmilla’s eyes. Completely blown pupils are staring back at her, an almost animalistic expression covering the brunette’s face.

 

Carmilla drags her teeth over her earlobe, soothing it with the tip of her tongue. “Don’t be embarrassed.” She whispers into Laura’s ear, voice incredibly hoarse. “Do you have any idea how much of a turn on it is to know you’re this wet because of me?” Laura has to swallow a few times when Carmilla licks a trail up her throat and lightly bites on her pulse point before sucking again. Laura’s hands move back up to cup both of Carmilla’s breasts. She can’t remember ever being as turned on as she is right now. She’s so turned on, she can feel herself pulse and the lack of contact where she wants it the most is actually starting to get a little painful.  
  
She kisses a trail down Carmilla’s body until her lips are hovering right above her breasts. She quickly looks up at the brunette who is looking right back at her with hungry eyes, before closing her mouth around one of her nipples. She laps her tongue over the already stiff peak, lightly sucking on it. She’s encouraged when she hears a low moan coming from above her, quickly moving towards the other nipple while her hand keeps playing with the first one.  
  
Carmilla sits up, pulling Laura’s head back up to meet her lips for a deep kiss. “May I?” The brunette whispers, her hands resting on the clasp of Laura’s bra. Laura nods, biting her own bottom lip when the brunette unclasps her bra and slowly pulls the straps down her shoulders. Her mouth immediately finds its way around one of Laura’s nipples and she has to suppress a way too loud moan when she feels teeth lightly nibbling on her already hardened nipple. Carmilla sucks on it before repeating her motions on the other nipple, putting her weight against Laura until the brunette is laying on top of her.  
  
  
“I really,” Carmilla groans. “really, want to make you come.” She starts placing light kisses all over Laura’s face, from her forehead to her nose, cheeks and chin until she’s hovering above her mouth. “Do you want to come?” she breathes.

Laura nods, biting her own lip again. “Use your words, cupcake.” She groans and pulls the brunette in for another sloppy kiss. “Please.” She whispers against her lips, just loud enough for the other girl to hear.  
  
Carmilla licks her own lips before she starts placing wet open mouthed kisses all over Laura’s throat, her hand slowly making its way down the girl's body until she's softly cupping her vagina. Laura moans at the contact, immediately bucking up against her hand. “God, you’re so wet.” Carmilla whispers, slowly starting to rub over her soaked panties.  
  
“Carmilla, please.” Laura whimpers.  
  
“Tell me what you want, cupcake.” Carmilla whispers into her ear before sucking on her pulse point again.  
  
Laura groans, thrusting her hips against the brunette’s hand again. “You know what I want.”  
  
“I want to hear you say it, Laura.” She bites her bottom lip, pulling it into her mouth and soothing it with her tongue.

Laura closes her eyes in embarrassment. “Please, Carmilla. I want you inside of me.” She takes a deep breath. “Please fuck me with your fingers.”  
  
Carmilla moans at that. She puts her hand inside of Laura’s soaked panties, dragging her fingers through wet folds. She circles her thumb around her clit, careful to not actually touch it yet. She locks her eyes with Laura and slowly inches her index finger inside of the girl. Laura lets out a loud moan at that, her mouth quickly covered by Carmilla’s unoccupied hand. “Ssh, cupcake. We’re at a school camping trip, remember.” Laura opens her mouth but immediately closes it again when Carmilla curls her finger inside of her. Laura feels herself getting to the edge of coming already, this will definitely be a new record for her.  
  
Carmilla starts pumping into her with a steady rhythm, quickly adding a second finger and curling them against her inner walls. Her thumb keeps drawing slow circles around her clit, lightly flicking it every once in a while. Laura’s breath is completely ragged already, she licks into Carmilla’s mouth while moving her hips against the girl’s fingers in thrusting motions.   
  
“Carmilla, I’m about to-” she lets out a loud moan when Carmilla’s thumb puts pressure on her clit before quickly letting go again. “I’m coming. I’m coming, oh my god.”  
  
Carmilla bites her pulse point while she keeps thrusting her fingers into the girl, using the palm of her hand to put pressure against her clit. “Come for me, baby.” She whispers into her ear, feeling Laura exploding around her fingers when she bites her earlobe.  
  
Laura's eyes roll into the back of her head and she lets out a loud moan against the hand that’s still covering her mouth. Carmilla softly pulls her fingers out, holding them in front of Laura’s mouth. Laura immediately closes her lips around the digits and she whimpers at the taste of herself on the brunette’s fingers.

 

Carmilla pulls her fingers out and quickly replaces them with her mouth. They’re not even really kissing, just desperately licking into each other’s mouths. She starts kissing a trail down Laura’s body, stopping at her breasts to suck on both of her nipples before continuing her way down. Her tongue dips into Laura’s belly button and she blows some air on it, making Laura moan again.

She places a trail of kisses up both of her inner thighs, lightly nibbling her way up until her mouth is resting right in front of Laura’s entrance. She places a soft kiss on the soaked panties before grabbing them and quickly pulling them down her legs. Laura’s eyes widen when she realizes what Carmilla is about to do and she lets out a moan in anticipation. Carmilla rests her head between Laura’s thighs again, smirking up at her before placing a flat tongue on her pussy and licking up slowly.   
  
Laura arches her back at the contact. “Carmilla” she whimpers, turning into a moan when Carmilla pushes her tongue inside of her and back out again. “You taste so good.” She moans, licking patterns through her wet folds, carefully avoiding the girl’s clit again. It only takes a few minutes until Laura can feel her orgasm building deep inside of her again. Carmilla increases her pace, changing patterns and sucking at her folds. She pushes two fingers inside of Laura when she feels the girl starting to tremble, closing her mouth around her clit and sucking at it.  
  
Laura comes again and she’s pretty sure she screamed out Carmilla’s name right before a hand quickly covers her mouth again. Carmilla keeps lapping at her folds while the girl comes down from her orgasm, careful to not touch her oversensitive clit. She kisses her way up after a few minutes, pulling the blanket up around them when she sees Laura is shaking a little.  
  
“You okay?” Carmilla asks, placing a soft kiss on the girl’s jaw. “Yes.” Laura smiles, trying to cover up her yawn. “It’s okay, go to sleep baby.” Carmilla whispers into her ear, softly stroking her hair while Laura curls around her. “But I haven’t even touched you yet.” Laura pouts before yawning again. Carmilla smiles at her. “It’s okay, you’re exhausted and you have a long day of activities tomorrow. Go to sleep.”  
  
Laura wants to protest but she can feel herself drifting off already. She places a few lazy kisses on Carmilla’s shoulder, hugging the girl closely against her. She closes her eyes and falls asleep with a smile on her face.  
  
  
  
  
  
Laura groans when loud voices coming from outside of her tent wake her up. She rubs her eyes, not ready to wake up yet. She blindly pats the mattress around her, trying to find Carmilla. She frowns when all she feels is the mattress and opens her eyes. _She probably already got up to take a shower or something._ Laura sits up, quickly grabbing some clothes and putting them on to make sure her friends won’t barge into her tent and find her naked. Laura snorts at the thought. _Imagine how horrified they would be._  
  
She’s about to make her way outside of her tent when a small note lying next to the mattress catches her attention. A frown takes over her features when she reads the words written on it.  


_Laura,  
  
I’m sorry.  
  
C x  
  
  
_ Laura lets out a deep sigh.   
  
_What the hell?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo.. that happened. Writing smut in english turned out to be harder than I expected it to be so I really hope you guys like it. And again, please let me know if you notice any mistakes. Comments and advice are greatly appreciated!


	4. Drown My Sorrows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: There's a mention of sexual assault, some mild violence and alcohol in this chapter.  
> The first part of this chapter will be Carmilla's POV and it switches back to Laura's halfway.

**Carmilla POV**  
  
Carmilla smiles down at Laura who is mumbling in her sleep. The blonde is wrapped around her, a leg thrown over own and her head is resting on Carmilla’s shoulder. She looks peaceful, apart from her hair that clearly screams she just had sex. Carmilla combs her fingers through it, closing her eyes while inhaling her scent. _God, she smells good._ She frowns at her own thoughts. She slowly sits up and carefully seperates herself from Laura before she can change her mind.  
  
She hadn’t intended to sleep with the girl. Hell, she didn’t even intend to talk to her except for when she would be absolutely required to. “Fucking shit.” She mumbles to herself, searching for her clothes lying around the tent and silently putting them back on. It literally just happened and as soon as Laura fell asleep, Carmilla knew she had to get as far away from here as possible. It had only been two days and she could already feel herself getting attached to the girl, something that she was absolutely not going to let happen again. It may have only been two days since she first talked to her but she knows damn well Laura has been on her mind ever since she first noticed the girl at school. _Just remember what happened with Ell. Think about Ell, don’t let this happen again._ She’s about to leave the tent when she turns around to look at Laura one more time. Her stomach drops at the thought of the girl waking up tomorrow only to find her gone.  
  
She looks around the tiny tent and notices a bright orange notebook lying on top of Laura’s backpack. She quickly grabs it and tears a page from it. She forces herself to write a little note and leaves it next to Laura on the mattress before kissing the girl on the cheek and making her exit.  
  
Walking towards her own tent she starts thinking of excuses that will work on Mr. Rogers. She needs to get out of here right now but she knows this trip is mandatory and she really wants to attend Silas University this year, the art course being the only positive thing in her life right now. _What will make a bigger impact on him? A dying sibling? A house fire? Maybe I can tell him one of my parents just found out they have an incurable illness.._ She keeps making up excuses in her mind while quickly packing all of her things and stuffing them into her duffle bag.

She sits down on the ground, leaning against her duffle bag and lights a cigarette. _Smoking is so disgusting, why do I even do this? Oh well, at least it can’t kill me._ She chuckles to herself. _Okay.. excuses. It has to be a good one._ She finally comes up with the perfect excuse, finishes her cigarette and makes her way towards Mr. Rogers’ tent. _Shit, how am I going to wake this dude? It’s not like I can just knock on a door or something. Which idiot came up with this whole camping idea anyway._  
  
She decides to just open the tent and hope for the best. The best being her teacher not being a naked sleeper. She breathes out a sigh of relief when she notices he’s fully dressed. He’s sleeping though, so this is about to be really awkward. She groans and gets inside. It takes a few not so subtle pushes against his shoulder before he finally wakes. “Carmilla?” He squints his eyes at her, shining a flashlight right into her face. “Jesus fucki-” She quickly cuts herself off, realizing now might not be the best time to swear in front of her teacher.  
  
“Hey, Mr. Rogers. I’m sorry for waking you.” _No I’m not._ “It’s just, I recently had some health problems, you know, the female kind.” She notices him making a face and prides herself on her excellent knowledge of the male population. “Well, I just got a call from the hospital and I’m afraid I have to leave this camping trip early. They want me to be back as soon as possible, you understand? It’s kind of a life and death situation.” She has to hold back her laughter at the look on his face.

“Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that Carmilla!” Carmilla fakes a smile and nods at him. “Yes, no worries. I’ll be fine, as long as I get back there today. I’m really disappointed to leave this camping trip early and I know it’s mandatory but I really don’t know what else I could possibly do.” She would roll her eyes at herself if it wouldn’t make her look suspicious. “Oh no, Carmilla, don’t you worry about that. It’s mandatory but we can always make an exception for situations like this! You’ll still be very much welcome at our University.” He smiles at Carmilla, reaching out to awkwardly pat her on the shoulder. “Do you need me to call you a taxi? It’s the middle of the night, I’m not sure if we will be able to get you back home right now.” Carmilla almost snorts but she’s able to hold it in. “Oh that’s alright, Mr. Rogers. My mom is actually on her way to pick me up. In fact, I think she’s already here so I guess I’ll be on my way. The sooner I’ll be at the hospital, the better!”  
  
“Definitely! I wish you good luck and a quick recovery and I hope to see you at classes next week!” He gives her a smile before finally getting the flashlight out of her face. “Thank you, Mr. Rogers! And would you be so kind to not tell the other students about my situation? I wouldn’t want them to worry.” This time she actually rolls her eyes at herself, grateful for the flashlight no longer shining in her face. “Sure thing, Carmilla!”  
  
Carmilla quickly makes her way outside of his tent, closing it up behind her. _Well, that went even better than expected._ She snorts. _Men and their uncomfortable behaviour about female problems.. I should get a medal for this performance._ She grabs her duffle back and walks towards the woods, making sure she’s far enough from the campsite before she finally starts running at superhuman speed. “My mom is coming to pick me up, Mr. Rogers.” She mimics herself, snorting before running back home full speed.

 

  
  
It takes her 30 minutes to get back home, which is 7 hours and 30 minutes faster than it took for the bus to get there. _Take that, humans._ She grins at herself before her face falls again when she thinks of Laura who is probably still fast asleep, having no idea Carmilla is nowhere near the campsite anymore. _Fucking hell Carmilla, get yourself together. Yes, she might be special and she might be the first person who made you feel anything in over a hundred years but what do you think will happen when she finds out who you really are? Remember what happened last time? Ell also seemed like the most beautiful person you ever met until you were dumb enough to tell her. Your entire family already died because of that mistake, you’re not making it again.  
  
_ Incredibly thirsty from her trip back home, she makes her way towards the busy clubbing part of town. _There’s got to be some rapist or animal abuser or something around here who doesn’t deserve to live, there always is, and he or she is about to be my dinner._ She sits down on the roof of someone’s car for a second, concentrating on the sounds around her. It doesn’t take her long to find what she’s looking for and she’s off the car and walking into the alley she heard the screaming come from within seconds. _Bingo._ She smirks when she sees some man around his 50’s trying to force himself on a girl who doesn’t look like she’s even old enough to go clubbing yet.  
  
She surges forward, grabbing the man by his throat and holding him up against the wall. “Run.” She calmly tells the frightened looking girl, not having to tell her twice as she quickly runs away. “What the hell, bitch. Put me down!” He says, sounding way less threatening than he probably intended since he’s halfway choking already. “Oh, I’m about to.” She smirks. “I don’t like having dinner while standing up.” She feels her fangs coming out of their sockets and licks her lips before surging forward and burying herself deep into the man’s neck.  
  
Carmilla sets the man on fire after draining him, not about to deal with a freaked out town because someone found a dead guy with biting marks on his neck. She licks her lips and walks away, wondering if she should go out to find some girl but quickly deciding against it. _They won’t compare to Laura anyway._ She rolls her eyes at herself. _She hasn’t even touched you yet, you’re in too deep already. Stop. Thinking. About. Her._ She makes her way to the little apartment she’s been living in recently, dumping her duffle bag inside before collapsing on her bed. _Five more days inside of this shithole and at least then I’ll have a comfortable dorm room to live in. Let’s just hope the cupcake doesn’t turn out to be my roommate._ She snorts. _  
  
_  
  
  
  
**Laura POV**  
  
Laura makes her way outside of her tent, still holding Carmilla’s note. She spots Mr. Rogers and is about to start walking towards him when she gets hit in the face by a soccer ball. “What the-” She’s cut off by a large guy, shouting at her from a few feet away. “I’m so sorry! Little nerd hottie! Are you okay?” Laura rubs her forehead, glaring at the guy who’s now standing in front of her. “We were just playing some soccer and you suddenly popped up out of nowhere and well, then the ball hit you!” Laura rolls her eyes. “Really? I hadn’t noticed.” She takes a deep breath, realizing the human version of a puppy standing in front of her obviously didn’t do it on purpose. “It’s fine, I’m fine.” She smiles at him. “Sweet! Also, one of your friends was just looking for you! You know, the redhead. The one with the curls, I think. I’m Kirsch by the way.” Laura suddenly remembers what she was supposed to be doing, shouting a quick “thanks, Kirsch!” at the human puppy before running towards Mr. Rogers.  
  
  
“Hey Mr. Rogers. Have you seen Carmilla?” She makes a face when he holds out a plate of bacon in front of her. “You’re late, eat your breakfast. We’re about to have our sports tournament!” Laura takes the plate from him, scrunching up her nose at the smell. “Ehm, yes. Sure.” She smiles at him. “So, Carmilla? Have you seen her?” “Oh, Carmilla. Yes. Carmilla went home.” Laura’s face falls at that. “What? Isn’t this trip mandatory? How did she even get home? She was here last night!” Mr. Rogers looks a little panicked before he quickly schools his face back to normal. “I can see why you’re a journalism major. Don’t worry your pretty head about it, Laura. She went home, you’ll have to ask her about it yourself if you see her next week. Eat your breakfast!” He quickly walks away, leaving a puzzled Laura behind.  
  
_What the hell is going on here? Why would she just leave? I can’t believe she didn’t even tell me. What if she regrets what happened last night? Is she angry because I didn’t return the favour? But that would be ridiculous, she was the one who told me to go to sleep!_ Laura feels herself getting worked up. She quickly stuffs her face with bacon before returning to her tent to change into her sports clothes.  
  
Lafontaine barges into her tent just a few seconds after she got changed. “God, Lafontaine, I know there’s not a door to knock on but seriously? I was pretty much naked just seconds ago!” She huffs, playfully pushing them out of the way so she can exit her tent. Lafontaine awkwardly smiles at her. “Oops, sorry Frosh. I was just going to ask you to join my team. We’re playing soccer against Kirsch and Theo!” Laura smiles at that, she does love soccer. “What about Perry, though?” Lafontaine rolls their eyes at Laura. “Are you even listening, Laura? We’re playing soccer! Have you ever seen Perry play soccer?” Laura snorts. “Good point, I guess I’m still waking up or something. Anyway, let’s go beat the human puppy!”  
  
  
  
  
  
The last few days of camping go by pretty fast. Laura catches herself imagining how annoyed Carmilla would be with most of the activities. In fact, her mind is more on Carmilla than on anything that’s happening and it gets her more frustrated each day. She just doesn’t understand how Carmilla could just leave her there without an explanation. Okay, truth is they barely even know each other but Laura thought they were at least getting somewhere. She took her virginity for god’s sake! Who just leaves a school trip in the middle of the night? Mr. Rogers had also been acting strange. He kept dodging all of her questions, even running off with weird excuses he clearly just made up a few times.  
  
She did have fun though. Lafontaine and Laura ended up coming second at the sports tournament. She climbed trees, roasted marshmallows and actually got to know most of the other students pretty well. She even went swimming in the lake with Kirsch and Theo one evening. Still, even when she did have a lot of fun, Carmilla and her weird disappearance were always on the back of her mind.  
  
  
  
“So you guys don’t think it’s weird?” Laura asks Perry and Lafontaine. They are on the bus back home and she'd just decided to finally tell them about Carmilla. She obviously let out all of the naked parts. They didn’t have to know about that. Lafontaine shrugs. “I mean, sure. It’s a little weird. But this is Carmilla we’re talking about, Carmilla is weird.” Laura rolls her eyes, she had hoped her friends would at least agree with her.  
  
“Look, Laura,” Perry sighs, putting her arm around Laura’s shoulders. “Lafontaine does have a point. I’m not one to judge but that girl is, well, she’s a little strange. And I don’t understand why it matters to you anyway? It’s not like you know her or something. There has to be a good reason for her leaving since Mr. Rogers told you she will be back at University, right?” Laura sighs. She knows her friends are kind of right but she just can’t help it, Carmilla just disappearing after what they shared makes her wonder if the girl even meant anything by it.  
  
_What if I’m just another girl she slept with? Would she do that to me even though she knew I was a virgin? She did seem to care.._ Laura sighs. The more she thinks about the situation, the more she realizes she doesn’t know the girl at all. She’s starting to feel like their night didn’t mean anything to Carmilla and it makes her stomach feel all kinds of wrong.  
  
  
  
  
  
It’s Friday 1pm and Laura just got dropped off at the campus where she will be living for the next four years. Saying goodbye to her dad had been hard, but it had also been kind of freeing in a way. They hugged goodbye about 20 times and she’s pretty sure her dad would have stayed at campus all day with the excuse of helping her unpack if it hadn’t been for his job. Her dad spent all morning informing her on all the dangers of living on a campus with so many students, he even went as far as giving her a bag filled with supplies to defend herself with. Laura rolls her eyes at the thought, when would she ever need something like bear spray?  
  
Laura takes her last bag up to her room, deciding to unpack everything before going on a walk to discover as much of the campus as she can. She had been the first to arrive in her dorm room, the other bed still empty. She wonders what kind of person her roommate will be, if she was religious she would be praying for someone clean right now. She closes the door behind her, carefully putting the last bag on the ground. She sighs and looks around. _This is it._ She smiles to herself before she starts unpacking, putting all of her stuff on her side of the room. She starts by making her bed, putting a few pillows down and placing her favourite yellow pillow on top of it. She hangs all of her clothes inside of the closet, placing her shoes beneath them. All of her books and her laptop take up the space on top of her desk.  
  
She’s just putting her pictures up on her side of the wall when she hears the door open and she quickly turns around. “Oh, it’s just you.” Lafontaine snorts. “Well jeez. Nice to see you too, Frosh.” Laura laughs, throwing a pillow at their face. “Sorry, I’m just really curious to find out who my new roommate is.” Lafontaine puts the pillow back down on the bed before patting Laura on the back. “I’m sure your roommate will be fine. Listen, there’s a party tonight that most of the freshmen will be attending. You in?” Laura smiles. Of course she’s in, she’s been looking forward to her first university party for months. “Yes, I’m in!” Lafontaine snorts at her enthusiasm. “Great! I’ll pick you up around 9 tonight, okay? I have to run back to our room now, there was some dirt in our bathroom and Perry has been freaking out.” Laura laughs, Perry has never been great with dirt. “Good luck, Laf.”  
  
  
Laura continues putting up her pictures when she hears her door open again. “You back already? I’m pretty sure it’s not 9 yet, Laf!” Laura laughs before turning around and freezing on the spot.

“Cupcake?” Carmilla’s eyes are as wide as Laura imagines her own are. “Of course.” Carmilla rolls her eyes, throwing her duffle bag on the ground.  
  
“What?” Laura squeaks. She just realized this is the first time she’s face to face with Carmilla after having sex with her and she can’t help but feel a little embarrassed. _How do people usually deal with situations like this?  
  
_ “Nothing.” Carmilla says, closing the door before sitting down on her own bed.  
  
“So.. we’re going to be roommates?” Laura asks, her voice coming out a few octaves higher than she would like it to be.  
  
“Looks like it.” Carmilla starts taking a few things out of her bag.  
  
“So.. you kind of disappeared from the camping trip. I’ve been wondering why you left without-” Laura forgets where she was going when Carmilla suddenly takes her top off, leaving her in a black lace bra. She feels a blush creep up on her face and quickly averts her eyes towards the ground.  
  
“Yeah, I went home.” Carmilla says, standing up.  
  
Laura looks back up, relieved when she sees Carmilla has put on a red plaid blouse. “Why?”  
  
“That’s a story for another time, cupcake.” And with that, Carmilla exits their room again, leaving a very confused Laura behind.  
  
_What the.. She’s not even going to make her bed?_ Out of all the scenarios Laura had made up in her mind, this one definitely wasn’t one of them. Laura huffs, quickly deciding to not let this ruin her day. _I’m just going to finish putting my pictures up, take a shower and enjoy my first university party._ Laura smiles to herself, determined to not let Carmilla ruin this for her.  
  
  
  
  
  
The party turned out way less exciting than Laura expected. Sure, there was free alcohol and it was nice to see everyone from her camping trip again. She played a few drinking games with Perry, Lafontaine, Kirsch, Theo and Danny and she actually won most of them. Danny got very drunk very quickly though and she started acting annoyingly affectionate as usual. Laura wishes she could say that was the worst part of the night, but it wasn’t. The worst part was Carmilla, surrounded by giggling girls across the room. She tried to make eye contact with her a couple times but Carmilla quickly looked away every time, acting like she didn’t even see her. One of the girls started kissing Carmilla’s neck and Laura just had to go. She was tired and she had a pretty good time so she decided to leave before her night would be ruined. She quickly said goodbye to her protesting friends before walking back to her dorm room, her throat feeling way too tight.  
  
  
She decides to take a shower since university parties apparently make you smell like an ashtray. Laura is just rinsing the shampoo out of her hair when she hears a loud thud coming from the other room. She freezes for a second before realizing it’s probably just Carmilla and continues washing her hair. She walks out of the bathroom, thankful she took her pyjamas to the bathroom with her so at least she won’t have to face she brunette naked.

Her eyes widen when sees  Carmilla lying flat on the ground, her arms stretched above her head. She’s wearing a bra and her leather pants and Laura snorts when she realizes she probably fell down while getting changed. “Carmilla, what are you doing?” She laughs.  
  
“I have fallen and I can’t get up!” Carmilla whines, sounding overly dramatic.  
  
Laura scrunches up her nose. “How much did you drink? I can smell you all the way over here.”  
  
“It’s your fault.” Carmilla whines, picking up her plaid blouse and throwing it towards Laura.  
  
Laura walks towards her, grabbing both of Carmilla’s hands and pulling her up into a sitting position. “What are you talking about?”  
  
“I hate you, you know.” Carmilla slurs, pointing her index finger towards Laura.  
  
“Oh.” Laura’s face falls. “Do you always have sex with people you hate? And why do you even hate me? Did I do something?” She can feel her throat tighten again. She hates herself for caring this much about anything Carmilla has to say, let alone a drunk Carmilla.  
  
Carmilla starts hysterically laughing, which only confuses Laura even more. “Come on,” she says, pulling on Carmilla’s hands to try and get her to stand up. “You should get changed and go to sleep.”  
  
“Fucking hell, Laura.” Carmilla whines. “Stop. Just fucking stop.”  
  
Laura is so confused at this point, she’s about to just go to bed and let Carmilla deal with herself. “Carmilla, I’m just trying to help you. Can you please get up?”  
  
“Sleeping with you is the worst decision I have ever made.” She says, pushing Laura aside.  
  
_Wow.. Okay._  Laura feels tears threatening to escape and she’s afraid she can’t stop them from falling this time. She angrily wipes them away. “Well I’m sorry it was such a bad experience for you.” She tries to growl at Carmilla but it just comes out as a sob.  
  
She walks towards her bed, not having any intention to help Carmilla with anything ever again. Carmilla grabs her hand, pulling her back towards her. Laura angrily turns around and she's about to give the brunette a piece of her mind when she’s faced with a crying Carmilla. She keeps tugging on her hand until Laura sits on the ground in front of her, confusion written all over her face.  
  
“You don’t understand.” Carmilla sobs, her thumb wiping the tears away from Laura’s face. “Please don’t cry.”  
  
“Carmilla, what the hell? You’re giving me whiplash here.” Laura frowns.  
  
“I know, I just..” Carmilla sighs. “I can’t explain it to you.” She reaches out, her hands grabbing both sides of Laura’s face. “You make me feel things.” She whispers, eyes locked with Laura’s. “You make me feel things I absolutely cannot feel.” She groans. “You haven’t even touched me yet and you already ruined me. I can’t even sleep with other girls without your annoyingly cute face taking over my thoughts. You’re making me feel things and I hate you for it.”

Laura can’t help the blush from creeping up on her face even though it’s probably very inappropriate to feel good about what the other girl just said. “I know you don’t actually hate me, Carmilla.” She sighs, standing up and pulling the brunette up with her. “Come on, you’re sleeping in my bed tonight.” Carmilla opens her mouth to protest but Laura’s hand quickly covers her mouth. “Shut up, Carm.” Laura pushes the girl towards her bed, making her lay down before getting in behind her and pulling the blanket on top of them.  
  
“Come here.” She sighs, putting her arms around Carmilla’s waist and pulling her towards her so that Laura’s front is pressed against the brunette’s back. Laura breathes in her scent, nuzzling into the crook of her neck with a sigh. Carmilla’s hands cover Laura’s hands resting on her stomach after a few minutes and Laura places a soft kiss underneath her ear.  
  
“Just so you know, you make me feel things too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really grateful for all of the reactions I've gotten so far, thank you! As always, your comments and advice are very much appreciated.


	5. Out Of Sight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: There's alcohol in this chapter.

Laura wakes up from something tickling her nose. She blows some air at it, hoping it will just go away so she can continue the particularly nice dream she was just having. She groans when it doesn’t go away, opening her eyes and squinting at the cause of her being so rudely awakened. She snorts when she realizes it's Carmilla’s hair that's currently covering half of her face. They apparently switched positions while they were sleeping. She’s no longer spooning Carmilla but she’s now laying on her back, the brunette laying pretty much on top of her. She smiles down at a still sleeping Carmilla who is holding onto her with a death grip. _Well, at least she didn’t disappear on me this time. That's progress, right?_ Her head is laying on top of the left side of Laura’s chest, hands tightly holding onto her top while their legs are intertwined.  
  
Laura smiles to herself when she thinks about everything that happened last night. She realizes they still have a long way to go and she honestly doesn’t even know if Carmilla wants to get to know her as much as she does. Still, it makes her feel so much better and confident now that she knows the brunette does feel the same thing she does, even if she most likely only told her because she was drunk. She moves Carmilla’s hair out of her face and shuffles a little so she's able to look at her face. _How can someone look this beautiful after a night of heavy drinking.. it's not even fair._ She softly caresses the girl’s cheek with her thumb and chuckles at the content sigh coming from the girl. _She looks peaceful._  
  
Carmilla starts stirring a little and Laura is pretty sure she’s awake even though she's obviously pretending to still be asleep. She wiggles herself down a little and carefully removes Carmilla’s face from her chest, putting her down on her yellow pillow instead. She turns around so she’s laying on her side, facing the brunette. “I know you’re awake.” She whispers. She snorts at the loud groan coming from the other girl and places a soft kiss on her cheek. “Barely awake and so grumpy already.” She gives her another light kiss, this time on her jaw.  
  
“Wake up, sleepy head.” Carmilla just closes her eyes even tighter at that, clearly not having any intention of waking up this early. Laura rolls her eyes before kissing a trail from the girl’s cheek to her jawline, smiling against her skin when a soft moan escapes Carmilla’s mouth. “Laura..” she whines, opening one eye to look at her before quickly closing it again. “You know..” Laura whispers, placing a soft kiss right underneath her ear. “I still haven’t touched you yet.” Her teeth lightly graze the girl's earlobe before she bends her head down a little to suck on her pulse point. “And I really want to touch you.” She breathes.  
  
Laura has no idea where all of this confidence is suddenly coming from but she’s not about to start questioning herself now. She caresses the brunette’s cheek again, smiling when she finally opens her eyes to look at her. “We really shouldn’t do this, cupcake.” Carmilla reaches out to trace her thumb across Laura’s bottom lip. Laura pouts, laying her head back on the pillow next to the girl. “It’s not because I don’t want to.” Carmilla whispers, her eyes burning into Laura’s. “Believe me, I want to.” She sighs, lightly trailing her fingers up and down Laura’s upper arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake. “It’s just, I need to think.” She rolls her eyes when Laura pouts at her again. “I know this doesn’t make sense to you, cupcake.” She learns forward to place a soft lingering kiss on the blonde’s lips. “You really just have to give me some time, okay?” Laura sighs and gives her a small smile. “Okay.”  
  
  
  
  
Laura wakes up a few hours later, frowning when she realizes she apparently fell asleep again. _Ugh, I’m blaming this on Carmilla. She’s just way too comfy._ She takes a look at her left side, finding Carmilla fast asleep. _Shocker._ She carefully untangles herself from the girl's limbs before climbing out of bed and making her way towards the bathroom. She really needs to pee and she also doesn’t want to waste her second day on campus laying around in bed all day. She brushes her teeth and takes a shower, rolling her eyes at Carmilla who’s still asleep when she walks back into the room. She wonders if she should wake her up for a second before snorting at herself. _Definitely not, she might murder me._  
  
It’s fifteen minutes later when Laura walks out of her dorm room. She thought about leaving a note for Carmilla but decided against it. _It’s not like we’re married or something. Hell, we’re not even dating._ She buys herself some breakfast at the cafeteria before spotting Perry and making her way over to the redhead. “Hey, Per!” She sits down next to her, unwrapping her muffin. “Hey, Laura! I was just thinking about calling you. Laf and I are going to get some groceries later and we were wondering if you want to join us? Kirsch offered to give us a ride so we won’t have to carry the bags all the way back here.” Laura takes a sip of her coffee and smiles at Perry. “Yes! I really need to do some grocery shopping, I’m totally in!”  
  
  
  
  
Three hours later Laura is sitting in the front of the car next to Kirsch who is playing some really weird and mostly loud rap music. “This is my jam!” He loudly announces and Laura can't keep herself from snorting, he’s been saying that about every song for the past fifteen minutes. “Guys!” Lafontaine shouts from the back. “We should totally have a game night tonight. It’s Saturday and it’s our first weekend at university!” Laura and Perry immediately agree, both excited about the idea. “Is Danny coming too?” Kirsch asks, turning around to face Lafontaine before quickly turning his eyes back on the road after receiving a glare from Perry. “Yes! We should totally invite her. And you and Theo should come as well, it could be like a little camping reunion!” Lafontaine shouts over the music. “Could we do it at your room though, Laura?” Perry asks. “You know how I feel about our place getting messy and maybe you could invite Carmilla as well?”  
  
Laura thinks about it for a second. She’s pretty sure Carmilla will be less than excited to attend a game night with her friends but she agrees anyway. _She could always just leave the room and it’s not like she has that many friends here, it could be nice._ Kirsch parks the car in front of the campus' entrance, quickly agreeing on a time with Lafontaine before they get out of the car. “I’ll see you guys tonight at eight then?” Laura asks, holding her incredibly heavy grocery bags. “Yeah!” Lafontaine grins at her. “I’ll bring the booze!”  
  
  
  
Laura walks into her room, a deep sigh escaping her when she can finally drop the weight of her grocery bags. _I should definitely buy my groceries in smaller amounts next time._ She takes a quick look towards the bed and she’s actually shocked to learn Carmilla has finally decided to get up. She doesn’t see her anywhere though, so she figures she must have gone out as well. She bring her grocery bags over to their little kitchen area and starts putting them away while snacking on the cookies she just bought. “Morning, cupcake.” The voice suddenly comes from behind her, startling her so much she almost drops her cookie. “God, Carmilla. Are you a cat or something? Sneaking up on people like that.” She turns around, facing the smirking girl. Her eyes widen when she notices what she’s wearing and she quickly turns back around to hide her blush. Carmilla is wearing her leather pants, because of course she is, as well as a very low cut black top that makes her cleavage look even better than usual. Her look is completed by a green plaid flannel knotted around her waist, and honestly she couldn’t look more appealing to Laura if she tried. “By the way, me and my friends are having a game night tonight.” She quickly blurts out, trying to distract Carmilla from the blush currently covering her entire face.  
  
“What, here?” Carmilla groans, stepping behind Laura and reaching over her shoulder to grab a cookie out of the package.  
  
“Yes, here.” Laura squeaks, warmth lingering on her back from the few seconds the girl was pressed against it. “You’re invited too, if you want to join us.”  
  
Carmilla sighs. “Well, I don’t really have a choice now do I. I’m not about to leave my room all night just because you invited your idiotic friends over.”  
  
Laura rolls her eyes, turning around and walking past Carmilla towards her closet. “My friends are actually pretty cool, you know.” She starts looking through her closet, smiling at herself when she finds what she was looking for. “Plus, there will be alcohol. I couldn’t help but notice you enjoy that last night.” She smirks at the scowl being directed at her.  
  
“Fine! I’ll allow it. But don’t think you get to complain if I ever invite one of my friends over.” Carmilla walks towards her own bed, laying down and grabbing one of her very old looking books.  
  
“Allow it? Excuse me but this isn’t just your room, cutie.” She mimics Carmilla. “Also, please don’t take this the wrong way but since when do you have friends?”  
  
Carmilla rolls her eyes, grabbing one of her pillows and throwing it towards Laura’s head. “Just because I didn’t befriend any of those lackwits at this school doesn’t mean I don’t have friends at all, cupcake.” She smirks when the pillow hits the girl right in the head. “You do know there are other places to meet people, right?”  
  
Laura narrows her eyes at the girl. “You know, I liked you better with your head between my legs.” Her eyes widen immediately after the words escape her mouth. _Oh my god, did I say that out loud?_ One look at the shocked expression on Carmilla’s face tells her that yes, she did indeed say that out loud. “I’m going to take a shower.” She squeaks, practically running towards the bathroom.  
  
  
Laura rolls her eyes at herself when she’s standing in the bathroom, looking at herself in the mirror. She just panicked and told Carmilla she was going to shower but she already showered a few hours ago and now she’s not sure what to do. _It’s totally weird if I walk back out right now. Seriously Hollis, why can’t you ever just be smooth?_ She sighs and turns on the shower even though she has no intention of getting under it. She starts undressing and changes into the clothes she just got from her closet. She smirks at herself in the mirror when she’s done, feeling confident about her little plan. She knows Carmilla told her she needs time to think but that doesn’t mean she’s not allowed to tempt her a little, right? She grabs the bag holding the make-up she rarely uses out of the cabinet, figuring she might as well complete her look now that she’s taking a pretend shower.  
  
  
  
  
Laura turns the shower back off around 30 minutes later. She’s finishing up her hair and the end result is definitely not disappointing. She’s wearing skin tight jeans, the ones that she knows make her ass look incredible. She snorts. _I should definitely thank my dad for dragging me to all of those sports and self-defence classes. I may have hated most of them but at least they made me end up with a pretty good ass._ She’s wearing a white sleeveless top that she knows show off the muscles on her arms and her make-up turned out better than expected as well. _See, two can play this game._ She smirks at herself in the mirror one more time before dumping the clothes she was wearing before in the laundry basket and exiting the bathroom.  
  
Carmilla is still laying on her bed, holding a big old looking book in front of her face. In fact, she looks like she didn’t even move an inch the entire time Laura was in the bathroom. She rolls her eyes, which come to think of it, she’s been doing a lot ever since she started talking to Carmilla. She walks over to the kitchen to get some glasses and cans of soda, figuring her friends should be here any minute now. “Do you want a grape soda or did you just want to wait until the alcohol arrives?” Carmilla lowers her book so she can look at the girl and Laura smirks when she sees her eyes widen. _Good, looks like it’s working._ “I’ll wait.” Carmilla says, her voice sounding way higher than usual. “Are you feeling okay? You look a little flustered.” Laura asks, an innocent smile covering her face. “I’m fine.” Carmilla growls, quickly putting the book back in front of her face.  
  
“Hey, Frosh!” Lafontaine shouts while barging through the door, closely followed by Perry, Danny, Theo and Kirsch. “Hey guys.” Laura waves at them. “You can just put the drinks on the ground, Laf! We don’t really have enough chairs so I figured we could just sit there.” She tells them while sitting down on the ground, her back resting against her bed. A loud groan comes from Carmilla’s direction. “Seriously? Did you invite the entire campus or something?” Laura rolls her eyes. “No, these are just my friends. Stop being all grumpy and come over here.” Laura is surprised when Carmilla actually follows her instructions, putting her book away before slowly making her way over to Laura and sitting down next to her. “You look nice.” Perry smiles at Laura, sitting down next to her on her other side. “Thank you!” Laura smiles.  
  
  
The rest of the group sits down as well and Danny starts filling up everyone’s glasses. “I didn’t know the mistress of the snark would be here as well.” She mumbles, glaring at Carmilla. “The feeling is mutual, Xena.” Carmilla glares right back at her. “Alright, let’s just.. calm down with the insults.” Laura sighs. “We’re all friends here.” Danny snorts but doesn’t say anything else. “Alright!” Lafontaine says. “I thought we could start with a little game of never have I ever? You know, the go to game to get real drunk real fast!” Kirsch pumps his fist in the air. “Oh you’re all so going down! I bet I have done more than anyone else here!” Carmilla snorts and Laura has to keep herself from doing the same, Kirsch obviously doesn’t quite understand how this game actually works.  
  
“Okay, I’ll start.” Perry says. “Never have I ever failed an exam.” Everyone except for Perry groans before taking a shot. Laura’s face scrunches up at the taste. “Ew, Danny. What did you put in here?” Danny rolls her eyes at the girl. “Vodka! It’s way more effective than those sugary drinks you usually drown yourself in, Hollis.” Laura shrugs, she likes her sugary drinks. “Alright, I’ll go next.” Carmilla says, rolling her eyes at the shocked expression Laura gives her. “Never have I ever had a threesome.” Lafontaine immediately starts laughing so hard they're almost crying. “Getting straight to the point of the game, I see.” They point at Carmilla. “See, I like you already.” Carmilla snorts and takes a shot, glaring at all of the baffled expressions she’s receiving. “What?” she sighs.

“You’ve really had a threesome?” Laura squeaks, staring at Carmilla with wide eyes. Carmilla answers by wiggling her eyebrows at the girl. “I’ll go next!” Danny shouts, interrupting their moment. “Never have I ever been black out drunk.” Lafontaine, Kirsch and Carmilla all take a shot. “What?” Lafontaine laughs at the shocked look on Perry's face. “It was for science!” Laura finally came up with a good one so she tells the group she will be next. “Never have I ever cheated on someone.” She looks around to see Theo, Kirsch and Danny take a shot. Carmilla, however, doesn’t take a shot even though Laura somehow expected her to. _Interesting.._ “I’ll go next!” Kirsch shouts, accidentally knocking over one of the shots in the process. “Watch yourself, beefcake!” Carmilla tosses one of Laura’s pillows at his head. “Sorry little nerd hottie and angry sexy hottie!” Laura snorts when she notices the mortified look on Carmilla’s face. “Anyway. Never have I ever had sex in an inappropriate place.”  
  
Laura feels herself freezing for a second before quickly turning her head to look at an already smirking Carmilla. _Was it an inappropriate place? Okay who am I kidding, it definitely was._ Carmilla, Kirsch and Theo take a shot and Laura tries to take hers very subtle as to not pay any attention to herself. “Frosh!” Lafontaine shouts. _So much for being subtle._ “You had sex? You’re not a virgin anymore? And you already had sex in an inappropriate place?” They wiggle their eyebrows at her. “Color me impressed.” Laura can feel her face turning into a very dark shade of red. “Oh my god.” Danny looks at her, a mix of shock and disappointment covering her features. “Really?” She asks. “Oh my god, can we please change the subject?” Carmilla snorts next to her. “I would like to hear the story as well, cupcake.” Laura glares at the brunette, elbowing her into her side.  
  
  
They play a few more rounds until Theo announces he’s bored. “Let’s play something a little more interesting.” He says. “Truth or dare!” Kirsch shouts, high fiving a approving Theo. “Ugh, you’re such children. Does anyone above the age of fifteen even play that game?” Carmilla rolls her eyes when Laura glares at her. “What? I’m just saying.”  
  
“You could always just leave, no one is forcing you to be here.” Danny scoffs.  
  
“And not be here to make sure you lackwits don’t tear up my room? I don’t think so, beanstalk.”  
  
“Okay!” Lafontaine shouts, desperate to break up the tension. “I’ll start. You either choose truth or dare and anyone who doesn’t follow through with their question or dare has to take a shot!” Laura sends them an appreciative smile. “Okay. Kirsch, truth or dare?”  
  
“Truth!”  
  
Lafontaine chuckles. “Are you a virgin?”  
  
“What? Not cool, bro!” Kirsch huffs when everyone laughs at him. “What? I’ve got game! Anyway, my turn.” He looks around, obviously taking the task of choosing someone way too serious. “Little nerd hottie! Truth or dare?”  
  
“Dare!” Laura shouts before her mind catches up with her. _Okay.. so I’m probably more intoxicated than I thought I was._ “Wait no, I meant truth! I want the truth.”  
  
“That’s not how it works, little nerd.” Kirsch beams at her. “You have to follow through with your first choice!”  
  
Laura glares at him. “He’s kind of right, sorry Frosh.” Lafontaine snorts at the girl's glare now being pointed in their direction.  
  
“For god’s sake, just let the cupcake choose whatever she wants.” Carmilla’s eyes roll so far back in her head, Laura is pretty sure she should be able to see her own brain. “Idiotic children..”  
  
“Aren’t you the exact same age as us?” Danny scoffs. Carmilla just glares in her direction.  
  
“Whatever guys, just give me a dare already.”  
  
“Okay, Laura.” Kirsch looks like he’s deeply thinking about it before a huge smile covers his face. “I dare you to make out with tall angry hottie over here!” He points in Danny’s direction.  
  
Laura's face falls and a blush creeps up on her face. She isn’t particularly excited to make out with Danny but one glance at a very annoyed looking Carmilla makes her decide this might not be the worst idea. _Interesting. I wonder if this might speed up Carmilla’s thinking process a little.._ She smirks at herself, quickly standing up and making her way towards Danny.  
  
“It has to last for a minimum of ten seconds!” Kirsch shouts. “I’ll be counting!” Theo adds.  
  
Laura sits down in front of Danny and second thoughts start flooding her brain when she actually pays attention to her face. She knows Danny has been into her for as long as she can remember and the look on her face is so hopeful, it makes Laura feel a little bad about herself. She could still choose to take that shot but honestly the world is already slightly spinning and she really doesn’t plan on passing out tonight.  
  
Danny’s lips are pressed against hers before she can make up her mind, however, so she decides to just go with it. The kiss isn’t too bad, Danny is a pretty good kisser. She can’t help imagining those lips belonging to a certain brunette though and it’s making her feel even guiltier than she already was. Danny’s tongue traces her bottom lip at the same time she hears Kirsch shouting that it’s time and she quickly pulls away. _Saved by the bell._  
  
She smiles at a beaming Danny before standing up and making her way back to where she was sitting before. She finds the courage to glance towards Carmilla and her eyes widen at the look on her face. She’s glaring at Danny and it’s not just her usual glare. She looks like she’s about to explode and Laura knows she shouldn’t feel as satisfied as she is currently feeling. _I’m pretty sure smoke would be coming out of her ears if we were in a cartoon right now._ Murderous, that’s the correct description. It looks like she’s genuinely about to murder the redhead.  
  
Carmilla grabs two of the shots and throws them back one after the other.  
  
“Damn girl, chill. It’s not even your turn.” Theo laughs at her, his face falling when he receives a death glare.  
  
“What? We’re only allowed to drink if it’s our turn?” She growls. “I’m thirsty.”  
  
Laura snorts at the choice of words before quickly schooling her face back to normal when the brunette’s glare is directed towards her.  
  
Laura takes a deep breath. “Okay, Carmilla. Truth or dare?”  
  
Carmilla rolls her still murderous looking eyes. “Dare.”  
  
Laura smirks, she was hoping the brunette would choose dare. “I dare you to get locked up in our closet with a person of your choice.” She laughs at the annoyed look she receives. “For five minutes!” She quickly adds. _Please choose me, let her choose me._ Laura crosses her fingers.  
  
“Any particular reason you’re trying to get me back into the closet, cupcake?” She huffs, receiving loud laughter from Lafontaine.  
  
Laura rolls her eyes. “Fine.” Laura beams at her. “Don’t get too excited, cupcake.” Carmilla smirks. “You’re coming with me.”  
  
Laura frowns to feign a offended expression. _Not like that was exactly what I was hoping for or anything._ “Alright, let’s get back into the closet. You know, for old times’ sake.” She holds her hand out for Carmilla and chuckles at her annoyed expression.  
  
“I’ll be in charge of the lock!” Kirsch shouts, sounding way too excited about the task. “What?” He rolls his eyes at Carmilla’s glare. “Two hotties locked inside of a closet! That’s like at least double as hot!”  
  
Carmilla looks like she’s about to strangle him so Laura quickly pushes her inside of the closet, getting in behind her. “You better let us out after five minutes, Kirsch!” She gives him a serious look that turns into a smirk. “Or I’ll tell Sarah Jane all about your centuries old crush.”  
  
Kirsch’s mouth opens and closes a few times. “Not cool!” He whines, winking at Laura before closing the door and locking it.  
  
It takes Laura about five seconds to realize this might not have been the best idea she’s ever had. The closet looks way bigger from the outside and her drunk mind obviously didn’t think about what being this close to Carmilla would do to her body.  
  
“So..” She squeeks, rolling her eyes at herself. She turns her body so she’s facing Carmilla even though she can barely even see her in the dark closet. “What now?”  
  
“You tell me.” Carmilla whispers, her voice sounding like she’s completely out of breath. She clears her throat. “This was one of your great ideas, wasn’t it?”  
  
Laura frowns. “Are you okay? You sound like you just ran a marathon or something. She reaches out to touch Carmilla’s shoulder but the girl immediately swats her hand away.  
  
“I’m fine.”  
  
“You don’t sound fine.” Laura smirks. “What? Are you afraid of the dark or something?”  
  
“I said I’m fine.” Carmilla tries to growl but her voice just sounds shaky.  
  
Laura’s face falls when she realizes Carmilla is definitely not fine.  
  
“No you’re not.” She reaches out to grab the girl’s shoulder again and this time she lets her. “Did you drink too much? Should I ask them to let us out?”  
  
“Cupcake..” Carmilla groans. “It’s fine. I’m just..” She clears her throat. “I don’t do particularly well locked inside of small dark spaces, okay.”  
  
Laura’s eyes widen. “Carm.. I’m so sorry.” She swallows. “I didn’t know that. Why didn’t you just tell me?”  
  
“I need to think of my image, cupcake.” She jokes. “I’m not the type of person to tell a group of random children about my deep dark secrets, alright.”  
  
Laura’s hand is still holding onto the brunette’s shoulder and she can feel her entire body shaking. She pulls on her shoulder until the girl’s front is pressed against her own and tightly wraps her arms around her waist. “Anything I can do to help?”  
  
“You could try to distract me.” She whispers in her ear, placing a soft kiss right underneath her earlobe.  
  
Laura smiles and leans back a little before softly grabbing the back of the girl’s head and pushing it towards her. She presses a soft kiss on the side of Carmilla’s mouth, not really able to immediately find her lips in their dark surroundings. Carmilla smiles against her lips, moving her head slightly to the left so their lips are pressed against each other.  
  
Laura opens her mouth a little, letting the tip of her tongue dart out to lick her bottom lip and she’s immediately granted entrance. Their tongues meet each other and Laura breathes out a sigh of relief. She knows it has only been a few days since they last kissed but it feels like an eternity. Carmilla sucks at her bottom lip before biting it and pulling it inside of her mouth. Laura whimpers when the girl pulls back a little. “Please don’t ever kiss anyone else in front of me again.” She whispers, the hands resting on Laura’s waist pulling her even tighter against her.  
  
Laura sighs, pressing a soft kiss on the brunette’s lips. “You’re the one who wants time to think, Carm.” She smiles when Carmilla places a row of soft kisses on her jawline. “If it makes you feel any better, her kiss has nothing on yours.” Her eyes widen when she feels the brunette firmly grabbing her ass. “It does.” She breathes, connecting their lips again.  
  
“It’s time!” Kirsch’s loud voice comes from outside of the closet and they barely have time to step away from each other before the door swings open. He wiggles his eyebrows at the flushed look on Laura’s face. “Had fun in there?” He smirks. Carmilla pushes him out of the way. “Sure, beefcake. I just love being back inside of the closet, brings back so many great memories.” Laura snorts, following Carmilla out of the closet and back to her group of friends.  
  
“You look a little sweaty, Karnstein.” Danny scoffs. “You scared of the dark or something?”  
  
Carmilla just smirks at her. “Well, that’s what usually happens when you participate in certain.. activities.” She winks at her, saying that last word in an incredible suggesting tone.  
  
Danny’s face falls at that and she glares at her before grabbing one of the shots and downing it.  
  
Laura tries to hide her blush behind Perry’s back and she’s glad when Lafontaine changes the subject. “So, this has been fun but I just had to eat two packages of cookies and I feel like I’m about to throw up so I guess we’ll be heading back.” They snort at the glare they receive from Laura. “Sorry, Frosh. It’s not like I had a say in it, it was either your incredibly tasty cookies or another shot of not so tasty vodka.”  
  
Laura hugs all of her friends goodbye, once again faced with how drunk she is when Kirsch picks her up to spin her around and the entire room keeps spinning long after she’s been put back down. She waves at them before closing the door and turning around. She raises her eyebrow when she catches Carmilla in the act of blatantly staring at her ass. She drops the key she just locked the door with on purpose and makes a show of bending down to pick it up, smirking when she hears the loud groan coming from Carmilla.  
  
“I’m going to take a shower, I smell like the basement of some old men café.”  
  
Laura grins to herself. _Oh, this plan is so working. I’m a genius._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed and thanks again for all of the reactions I have received so far, it really means more than you know!


	6. Let Our Hearts Ignite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Sexual Content.  
> This chapter is a little shorter than usual but I'm positive the content will make up for it.

Laura starts undressing herself to change into her pyjamas when the sound of the shower running makes her think of a better idea. _What if I just.._ She walks over to the bathroom door, quietly turning the doorknob to see if it’s locked. It isn’t. She quickly takes off her bra and underwear, making sure she doesn’t give herself any time to overthink this. Laura is a hundred percent certain the amount of alcohol she’s had is the only reason she would ever even think of doing this but she prides herself on her courage anyway. She silently makes her way inside of the bathroom and softly closes the door behind her. Laura never quite understood why anyone came up with shower doors that you can’t see through until now and she takes a mental note to thank whoever decided to place one of those in their shower.  
  
  
She opens the shower door ajar and takes a peek inside, having to swallow a few times when she’s faced with Carmilla’s glorious behind. She softly closes the door and turns around, now realizing she didn’t really think this through. _Great. So what am I supposed to do now? It’s not like I can just sneak up on her from behind, that would be all kinds of wrong._ She doesn’t have to give that too much thought, however, since Carmilla apparently already noticed her. “Cupcake, what are you doing?” She groans, her back still facing the blonde. _What the.. how does she know I’m here already? I was being all silent! There's no way she heard me come in._  
  
  
Laura takes a deep breath. _To hell with it._ “I want to touch you.” She whispers. She had meant for the words to come out with confidence but they leave her mouth sounding way too desperate for her liking instead. “Please.” She adds.  
  
Carmilla slowly turns around, wide eyes immediately roaming her body. She sighs deeply before locking her eyes with Laura’s and holding her hand out in front of her. “Come here.”  
  
Laura takes her hand, their eyes still locked, and takes the few steps to close the distance between them. Her hands quickly land on the brunette’s waist, pulling her closely against her own naked body. “Fuck.” Carmilla whispers. Laura smiles up at her before leaning down to place a few soft kisses on the girl’s bare shoulder. “Laura, wait.” Laura takes a deep breath and looks back up at the girl. “Look, Carm.” She sighs. “I know you told me you need time to think. And I totally respect that! It’s just..” She swallows. “The fact that you’ve touched me and I haven’t touched you yet is driving me crazy.” She swallows again at the hungry eyes staring back at her. “I want to touch you. I want to make you feel good.” She moves her head forward until her mouth is hovering right next to the girl’s ear. “I want to taste what you taste like.” She whispers.  
  
“Cupcake.. fuck.” Laura’s eyes widen when firm hands harshly land on her ass. Carmilla pulls the blonde flush against her body before capturing her lips with her own. Laura immediately opens her mouth, desperate to find the girl’s tongue again. Carmilla sucks on the tip of her tongue and bites down on her bottom lip before pulling it inside of her mouth and sucking on it. Laura licks into her mouth when the brunette pulls away again. “Laura, wait.”  
  
  
Carmilla snorts at the pout on the girl’s face, a loud laugh escaping her when she receives a glare. “I didn’t mean it like that, cupcake.” She places a soft kiss on her lips. “It’s just, I really do want to wash my hair first.” Laura breathes a sigh of relief and rolls her eyes. “I hate you.” Carmilla smirks at her. “No, you don’t. I know all about your undying love for me.” Laura snorts. “Fuck you.” The brunette wiggles her eyebrows at that. “Oh, I’m about to.” Laura quickly turns around, trying to hide her blush and the embarrassing large smile taking over her face from the other girl. She reaches over to grab the shampoo bottle from the shower rack. “What are you doing?” Carmilla frowns when the blonde squirts some of the shampoo on her hands. “Helping you.”  
  
  
She reaches over to grab both of the brunette’s shoulders and turns her around so that her back is facing her. She takes a step forward so there’s only a few inches between their bodies and starts massaging the shampoo into the girl’s scalp. A huge grin spreads on her face when she feels the girl leaning into her touch and it gets even bigger when she hears the low purring sound coming from her. She’s pretty sure she looks like a kid who just opened a big Christmas present right now and she mentally thanks all of the gods she’s ever heard of for Carmilla not being able to see her right now.

  
Laura takes a step forward so her front is pressed against the brunette’s back again. She reaches over to grab the shower head and slowly starts rinsing out the shampoo. She puts it back in its place after she’s done and wraps her arms around Carmilla’s waist, bending her head down and placing a few soft kisses on her shoulder. She frowns when she feels the girl's shoulders shaking a little and grabs both of her shoulders to turn her around again. Wide eyes find her own and she swallows when she notices the brunette is crying.  
  
“Carmilla,” she reaches out to wipe the tears away with her thumb. “What’s wrong?”  
  
Carmilla closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. “Nothing,” she sobs.  
  
“You’re crying,” Laura reaches out to pull the girl tightly against her. “When will you understand you can talk to me? Please just tell me what’s wrong.” She whispers.  
  
Carmilla’s arms circle her waist and she buries her face in the blonde’s neck. “You don’t understand, Laura.” She takes a deep breath. “It’s been such a long time since anyone has ever made me feel the way you do.” Laura smiles, pulling the girl even closer. “You’re so innocent. You’re such a beautiful, sweet girl and all I would do is ruin you. I’m not good for you, don’t you understand?”  
  
Laura frowns at the words leaving the brunette’s mouth. She pulls back a little so she can look into her eyes. “You act like I’m some weak teenager, Carm.” She brushes another stray tear away. “I have been through stuff too, you know.” She swallows. “You know what happened with my mom. I’m stronger than I look.”  
  
Carmilla smiles at her before shaking her head. “I know you are, baby.” Laura can’t help the smile forming on her face at the nickname, it’s her favourite by far. “There are just things that you need to know about me, Laura.” She sighs. “Things I can’t tell you about and it’s not fair for me to just act like everything is fine when you don’t know the real me.” She shakes her head at the frown forming on Laura’s face. “You may think you know me already, but you don’t. Not the most important things.”  
  
Laura sighs, feeling her throat tighten. “Why can’t you just tell me?”  
  
Carmilla gives her a sad smile. “Because you would run away as fast as your legs can take you.”  
  
Laura frowns. “You can’t possibly know that.”  
  
“It has happened before. I do know.” Carmilla sighs, letting go of the girl and stepping out of the shower.

Laura turns the shower off before following Carmilla outside. “Well, I don’t know what happened to you but I do know that I wouldn’t just run away from you.” She copies the sad smile on Carmilla’s face. “I probably couldn’t even if I wanted to.”  
  
Carmilla shakes her head, handing Laura a towel. “You really have no idea what you’re talking about, cupcake.”  
  
Laura sighs when the brunette exits the bathroom. She quickly towels herself dry before walking out as well. Carmilla is standing in front of her closet, still naked. Laura walks over to her and grabs the arms that are searching for pyjamas. She wraps her arms around the girl, pressing her front against her back so that she's pretty much immobilizing her.  
  
“Can you please try to forget about all of that stuff, whatever it is?” She whispers into her ear. “Just for tonight?” She smiles at the content sigh coming from Carmilla. “Please, let me make love to you.” She places a few lingering kisses on her neck. “Let me show you exactly how I feel about you.”  
  
Carmilla groans when one of Laura’s hands starts traveling down her bare stomach. “I want you to.” She whimpers when Laura softly cups her right breast. “God, I want you to.”  
  
Carmilla turns around in her embrace before grabbing both of Laura’s thighs and pulling her up. Laura immediately circles her legs around the girl’s waist. “Good,” she smiles at her. Carmilla's lips capture her own, kissing her in such a needy way it leaves Laura dizzy when she finally pulls away. She walks them over towards her bed and Laura makes a mental note of just how strong this girl seems to be. Carmilla sits down on the edge of the bed so that the blonde is straddling her before surging forward and finding her lips again. Laura softly moans when the brunette’s tongue darts out to find her own.  
  
Laura pushes her weight forward until Carmilla is laying on her back and she takes a moment to admire the girl’s naked body before bending down and kissing a trail down her neck. She moves her legs so that her left leg is pressed between both of Carmilla’s and starts lightly rocking into her. Carmilla gasps when Laura bends down and closes her lips around one of her nipples, sucking the already stiff peak into her mouth. She flicks her tongue against it before licking slow circles around it, letting her teeth graze over soft skin. Carmilla’s hands grab her ass, increasing the girl’s tempo a little. Laura moves over to her other nipple and Carmilla moans when she bites down on it while pinching the other one with her fingers.  
  
“Are you sure you were a virgin before me, cupcake?” She chuckles at the proud look on Laura’s face. “I learned from the best.” The blonde answers, winking at her before moving her head up again and licking a trail up the brunette’s throat. Carmilla groans and pulls on the back of Laura’s hair before capturing her bottom lip between her teeth. Laura groans when she feels the girl’s wetness covering her leg, a heat building deep inside of her own stomach.  
  
She grinds harder against the brunette’s leg, desperate to create some friction where she needs it the most. Carmilla’s hands find her breasts and she hisses when the girl pinches both of her nipples, making a loud moan escape her. “Look at me.” Carmilla whispers and Laura immediately locks her eyes with the brunette’s while continuing to grind against her leg. One of Carmilla’s hands move to the girl’s back, tracing her fingers up and down while kneading Laura’s breast and rubbing her nipple with the other one. “You’re so beautiful, Laura.” She frowns when the blonde looks down and she softly grabs her chin to pull her face upwards until she’s looking her in the eyes again. “I mean it.” She whispers. “You’re absolutely breath taking.” Laura blushes and gives her a shy smile. “You’re the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, Carmilla.”  
  
Carmilla smiles at her, trusting her hips upwards to meet Laura’s grinding motions. Laura whimpers, her breathing starting to get ragged. “Carm, I think I’m close.” She whimpers, a little embarrassed about the way she’s currently working up towards an orgasm. Carmilla just smiles at her and firmly grabs her ass, increasing the girl’s movements once more. “Good.” She breathes, moving her hips up against Laura’s to create a perfect rhythm. “Look at me when you come, baby.” She captures Laura’s lips for another deep kiss, leaving Laura completely out of breath when she finally pulls away. “Don’t be shy, just keep looking at me.”  
  
Laura's orgasm hits her when Carmilla firmly moves her leg upwards and pinches her nipple at the same time, keeping her eyes locked on the brunette’s while her insides explode. She bites down on her own bottom lip and keeps moving her hips until she’s fully back on earth again. She swallows when she finds dark hungry eyes looking up at her and bends her head down, softly licking into the girl’s mouth. Carmilla moans against her mouth when one of Laura’s hands makes its way down south until she’s cupping her. Laura slides her index finger through slick folds, spreading the wetness across her core before pulling her hand back again. She keeps her eyes locked on Carmilla’s and opens her mouth, closing her lips around her own finger before sucking on it. A loud moan escapes her when she finally gets to taste the brunette.  
  
Carmilla’s mouth falls open and a growl escapes her lips. “Fuck, Laura.” Laura sits up, straddling the girl. She traces the tips of her fingers over the brunette’s stomach, shyly looking down at her.  
  
“Carm, I’m nervous.” She whispers.  
  
“What are you nervous about, baby?” She smiles up at the blonde.  
  
Laura shrugs. “I don’t know.” She swallows. “What if I do it all wrong?”  
  
Carmilla sits up, placing a few hot open mouthed kisses on the girl’s jaw. “Go sit behind me.”  
  
Laura frowns but does what the brunette says anyway. She crawls over until she’s sitting behind the brunette, legs resting on each side of Carmilla so the girl is sitting in between her. She rests her chin on the brunette’s shoulder after placing a soft kiss on the bare skin.  
  
Carmilla leans back against her, taking one of Laura's hands and placing it just below her belly button. “Just do the same thing you do when you’re touching yourself.” She lightly traces her fingers up Laura’s arm. “I’ll be right here to guide you through it. There’s no need to be nervous, I promise.” She bends down to press a soft kiss on the girl's upper arm.  
  
Carmilla places her hand on top of Laura’s again, guiding it down until she’s cupping her entrance. “See how wet I am already?” She turns her head to the side and breathes into the girl's ear. “That’s all because of you.”  
  
Laura blushes. She slowly starts moving her fingers through wet folds again, copying the movements she uses when she touches herself. Carmilla softly moans. “Just like that, baby.” She slides her hands up and down the blonde’s legs, lightly grabbing at soft skin. She moans louder when Laura starts circling her index and middle fingers around her clit. “God, Laura.” She breathes. “Yes, don’t stop doing that.” She groans when Laura’s index finger dips into her entrance, thumb still circling her clit.

Laura starts feeling more confident after a few minutes. She closely pays attention to the way the girl reacts to her touch, repeating the motions that get her the biggest response. She sucks on Carmilla’s pulse point at the same time she thrusts two of her fingers inside, pride all over her face at the loud moan she gets in response. She keeps nibbling and sucking at her pulse point, her fingers now thrusting into her in a steady rhythm. She moves her other hand down as well to play with the girl's clit. Carmilla starts panting and Laura takes that as her cue to increase her movements, smiling to herself when the girl starts thrusting her hips up to meet her fingers halfway.  
  
“Another one, please.” Carmilla breathes, a loud moan filling the room when Laura immediately adds a third finger and curls them inside of her. “Yes.. fuck, Laura.” She moves her head to the side to capture the blonde’s lips for a messy kiss, tongue desperately licking into her mouth. Carmilla moves away from her after a few minutes to try and catch her ragged breath. “You’re going to make me come, Laura.” Her hips start frantically moving up against Laura’s fingers now. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” She screams out, hips still moving against the girl's fingers while she reaches her climax. Laura bites down on her shoulder, tongue darting out to soothe the soft skin.  
  
Laura slows her movements, taking her left hand away from her clit but she continues to move her fingers inside of her until Carmilla’s hand finds her own and stops her movements. She takes her fingers out, bringing them to her own mouth and closing her mouth around the digits. A soft moan escapes her when she tastes the girl again. “You taste so good.” She whispers into her ear.  
  
Carmilla sits up and turns around so that she’s facing the other girl again. She straddles the girl so that her own legs are laying on top of Laura’s. Her arms circle her waist, pulling the blonde against herself before reaching forward to capture her lips again. She groans when she tastes herself on Laura’s lips, tongues immediately finding each other again.  
  
“That wasn’t so bad, now was it?” Carmilla smiles at her when they both come up for air.  
  
Laura places a soft kiss on her lips before laying down on her back. She reaches both of her arms towards Carmilla. “Come here.” She smiles.  
  
Carmilla moves her legs back and rolls to the side, positioning herself so she’s facing Laura. The blonde immediately scoots over to her, throwing her arm across the girl’s waist so that her front is pressed against Carmilla’s.  
  
She nuzzles her head in the crook of Carmilla’s neck and places a soft kiss on her collarbone.  
  
Carmilla reaches out to pull the blankets on top of them and throws one of her legs over Laura’s before placing a light kiss on the top of her head.  
  
“That wasn’t bad at all.” Laura sighs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing smut in english keeps proving to be more difficult than expected so I really hope you guys enjoy it. All of your comments and advice are greatly appreciated so please don't be shy and keep them coming!
> 
> Also for those of you who asked, you can find me on  
> [Tumblr](http://www.recklessbian.tumblr.com/) and on  
> [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/stonenstewart).


	7. Be My Oxygen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: There's a panic/anxiety attack and violence in this chapter.  
> This chapter switches between Laura and Carmilla's pov.

It’s Sunday morning around 9 am and Laura woke up about two hours ago. She has pretty much been staring at the girl fast asleep next to her from the minute she opened her eyes, replaying last night’s events in her mind. She finally got to touch Carmilla and, god, would she like to do that again. The thought of it alone sends a shiver down her spine and it takes all of her strength not to wake Carmilla just so she can do it all over again. To be honest, it still baffles the girl how this beautiful creature lying peacefully asleep next to her has decided to be interested in her, of all people. She grins. Maybe her dad was right about her being a great catch after all.  
  
She hasn’t just been thinking about that part of the night, though. The conversation they had in the shower has been eating away at her and she has already come up with about twenty different scenarios of what Carmilla could possibly be too afraid to tell her. Her mind has gone from the brunette being a murderer to her having some incurable illness and she even gave the possibility of the girl being some criminal marked as wanted by the police a thought. The part that worries her the most is that none of these things would even make her question running away from the girl. _God, how am I in this deep already.  
  
_ Laura looks up at the sound of her phone receiving a message and she reaches out to try and grab it from the nightstand, accidentally elbowing Carmilla in the side in the process. She rolls her eyes when a loud groan informs her that the girl definitely felt it.  
  
“Cupcake..” Carmilla sighs, tightening her grip on the blonde’s arm. “Go back to sleep.”  
  
Laura chuckles. “I can’t, I’ve been awake for hours already.” She places a soft kiss on the brunette’s collarbone. “Guess you didn’t tire me enough last night.” She smirks.  
  
Carmilla opens her eyes to glare at the blonde. “Careful, cupcake.”  
  
Laura is about to tease her some more when her phone starts ringing. She reaches over, being able to successfully get a hold of it this time. Her eyes widen when she looks at the screen.  
  
“Shit, Danny.” She squeaks. _Shit, what time is it? I totally forgot about our plans for today.  
  
_ She quickly sits up and answers the call. “Hey, Danny!”  
  
“Hey, Hollis! You sound a little flustered, don’t tell me you forgot about our plans to go see that movie for journalism class today.” She laughs into the phone.  
  
“No, I didn’t!” She totally did. “I absolutely did not forget about our movie date!” She mentally slaps herself as soon as the words leave her mouth. _Way to give the girl even more false hope, Hollis.  
  
_ “Movie date, huh?” Carmilla whispers, wiggling her eyebrows at the blonde.  
  
Laura glares down at her, completely missing everything Danny just said. “Sorry, what? I think my connection might be a little bad, I didn’t quite catch that.”  
  
“I said we should meet up at the cinema in about thirty minutes to make sure we have good seats! Did you just wake up or something?” Danny laughs.  
  
Laura's eyes widen and she takes a deep breath when Carmilla sits up and starts placing soft kisses all over her stomach. She blushes when she remembers they're both still completely naked.  
  
“Yes! 30 minutes!” She squeaks.  
  
Carmilla dips the tip of her tongue into her belly button and blows some air on it before placing a trail of open mouthed kisses upwards.  
  
“Carmilla!” she whispers, narrowing her eyes at the smirking brunette.  
  
“What?” Danny says.  
  
“Nothing! 30 minutes is totally fine, I’ll see you then!” Laura quickly ends the call and tosses her phone on the bed before a moan escapes her throat.  
  
“Carmilla! Oh my god.” She hisses when the girl softly bites down on one of her nipples before closing her mouth around it. Laura clears her throat. “We can’t do this right now!” She gently pushes Carmilla back down, quickly escaping the brunette’s bed and walking over to grab some clothes lying on her own bed before her body has the chance to betray her. “I have places to be!”  
  
Carmilla groans. “Are you trading me for that beanstalk already?” She smirks when Laura throws her yellow pillow in her direction, completely missing her target.  
  
Carmilla grabs Laura’s phone and starts typing something in it.  
  
“What are you doing?” Laura narrows her eyes at the brunette.  
  
“I thought it was about time I gave you my number, cutie.” Carmilla winks at her.  
  
Laura smiles at that. “Anyway.. Danny is pretty cool, you know.” She huffs. “And she’s not as freakishly tall as you make her out to be!”  
  
“Whatever, cupcake.” Carmilla tosses the phone back on the bed and rolls over so she’s facing away from the blonde, burying her face into the yellow pillow that was just thrown in her direction. “Have fun at your little date.”  
  
“It’s not a date!” Laura laughs, throwing another pillow at the brunette’s head before quickly making her way towards the bathroom.  
  
  
  
  
Laura arrives at the cinema at 10 am, only a few minutes late. Danny is already waiting for her at the entrance holding their tickets and they quickly make their way inside. Laura was supposed to do at least some research before watching the movie but honestly all she knows is that it’s some old black and white movie that will only be played today. She brought her pencils and notebook with her, determined to start her year off by writing a great essay about it later. The movie theatre is more crowded than Laura expected it to be, she figures most of the people there must be students taking journalism classes as well.  
  
They don’t have time to buy popcorn, much to Laura’s dismay, and her growling stomach reminds her of the breakfast she didn’t have as soon as she sits down. She’s really hoping Danny doesn’t actually think they’re on a date right now, she’s unintentionally given her enough false hope to last her a lifetime already.  
  
“So, what is this movie about again?” She rolls her eyes at the unimpressed expression on Danny’s face. “What? I did my research! I guess I just kind of forgot about it afterwards.” She lies, not really in the mood for one of Danny's well-meant lectures right now.  
  
“It’s probably last night’s vodka.” Danny chuckles. “Which kind of makes it my fault since I was the one who brought it.”  
  
“Yes! I’m totally blaming you if anyone notices.” She smiles at the redhead. “So, what is it about?”  
  
“It’s about some kind of mafia group that was active around the 70’s.” Danny smiles. “It was rated R for gun violence, so this should be pretty good!”  
  
Laura feels her stomach sink at that. _Shit. Why didn’t you do your research, Hollis? Shit, shit, shit._ She immediately stiffens in her seat, forcing herself to keep taking calm breaths. _Okay, it’s just a movie. You can totally do this.  
  
  
  
  
_ They have made it about 30 minutes into the movie when Laura has finally gotten herself to relax again. It’s really not as bad as she expected so far and she’s been actively taking notes of everything that’s happening on the big screen. She’s just writing something down when a row of gun shots go off on the big screen and her entire body goes rigid in an instant. She drops her pencil, both of her hands tightly gripping onto the chair.  
  
She closes her eyes and starts trying to deeply breathe in through her nose and out through her mouth. _It’s just a movie, you’re fine._ The loud banging sounds keep on going and Laura isn’t sure if it’s been a few seconds or a few minutes already. _You’re fine, you’re fine, you’re fine._ She repeats the mantra in her head, finding her breathing ragged even though she’s trying so hard to keep it even. Images of her mom being shot start flooding her brain and her entire body starts shaking. _You’re not fine. Get out of here. You need to get out of here!  
  
_ Laura jumps up so fast it almost gives her whiplash and starts running towards the exit, tripping on people’s feet a few times along the way. She opens the door to exit the movie theatre and keeps running towards the bathrooms. Her heart is frantically beating inside of her chest and black spots are starting to blur her vision. She quickly locks herself into one of the stalls, her back sliding down the door until she’s sitting on the ground. She closes her eyes again only this time she’s faced with images of Carmilla's face instead of her mom. _Carmilla._  
  
Shaky fingers reach inside of her jean pocket to get a hold of her phone and she starts scrolling through her contacts until the brunette’s name appears. She presses call without giving it a second thought, tightly pressing the phone against her ear as if it is her lifeline. It takes about seven rings until the girl finally picks up.  
  
“Hey, cupcake!” Carmilla laughs into her ear. “Miss me already?”  
  
“Carmilla,” Laura breathes.  
  
“Yes, cutie. That’s who you called.” Laura hears someone talking to Carmilla in the background but she honestly doesn’t have the energy to care right now. “Do you need me to save you from big red over there? Because all you have to do it ask.”  
  
“Carm,” She whispers, her voice shaky as sobs start to escape from her throat.  
  
“Laura?” Carmilla’s voice is completely serious now. “Laura, are you okay?”

Laura tries to answer her but the sounds won’t come out.  
  
“Laura! Are you in here?” Danny’s loud voice sounds through the bathroom. She knocks on the door of Laura’s stall. “Laura? What’s going on? Open up!”  
  
Laura feels like she’s completely immobilized as images of her mom being shot start flooding her brain again.  
  
“Laura,” Carmilla’s concerned voice sounds into her ear. “Give the phone to Danny for me, baby. Can you do that?”  
  
Laura’s shaky fingers slide the phone underneath the door before her vision goes completely black. She feels like she’s unable to move or speak, all she sees is her mom getting shot over and over and all she hears is Danny talking in the background.  
  
“Hello? Carmilla, what the hell?” Danny sighs. “Yes, she’s here. I don’t know, she just got up and ran. Yes, I know she’s not okay, I’m not an idiot! No, she’s not letting me in. Yes, we’re still at the cinema. Hello?”  
  
Danny lets out a loud groan. “Sure, just hang up on me.” She starts banging on the door again. “Laura? Please just open the door!”  
  
  
  
  
  
**Carmilla POV**  
  
Carmilla gets out of bed just after Laura has left their room. She groans while making her way over to the bathroom. She would never admit it out loud but honestly she’s a little annoyed that Laura just up and left to go spend time with Danny. _Fucking beanstalk, she better not try anything again or god forgive me.._ She groans again when she hears her phone go off in the other room, making her way back with a toothbrush hanging from her mouth.  
  
“Hello?” She mumbles.  
  
“Hello sis, you sound wonderful.” A familiar cynical voice sounds into her ear.  
  
“Good morning, Mattie.” Carmilla rolls her eyes. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”  
  
“Well, I just found myself around the neighbourhood of that little school you apparently decided to attend. I figured I may as well pay my little sister a visit while I'm here.” A smile appears on Carmilla’s face at that. “We could even share a little snack, you know? For old times’ sake.”  
  
Carmilla snorts. “Yeah, yeah. Just get your butt over here, I figure you won’t need me to tell you any details?”  
  
“You know me so well, darling.” Mattie laughs. “I’m standing outside of that little building you're currently living in as we speak. Be there in a second!”  
  
Carmilla smiles to herself and ends the call. Mattie and her go way back and even though they are experts on getting on each other’s nerves, she’s the best friend she’s ever had. Hell, she’s not even a friend at this stage. She’s like the big sister Carmilla never got to have.  
  
She finishes brushing her teeth and she’s just done putting on some clean clothes when Mattie appears behind her.  
  
“Jesus fucking Christ, Mattie.” She glares at her before playfully pushing her shoulder. “Are you trying to give me a heart attack?” They both snort at that. _I guess my heart would have to be beating for that.  
  
_ She reaches over and pulls Mattie into a tight hug, sighing when she realizes just how much she’s actually missed her. _It’s been decades._

  
  
  
Carmilla and Mattie have been catching up for about an hour while sharing a blood bag when Carmilla’s phone goes off. Mattie gives her a amused look.  
  
“Since when do you have people calling you?” She smirks. “Apart from me, that is.”  
  
Carmilla rolls her eyes and looks at the screen to see who it is. _Cupcake?_ “Shut up, Mattie.”  
  
She answers the call. “Hey, cupcake!” She laughs at a slightly shocked looking Mattie eyeing her. “Miss me already?”  
  
“Carmilla,” Laura answers, not saying anything else.  
  
“Yes, cutie. That’s who you called.”  
  
“Cutie?” Mattie’s laughter fills the room. “Oh darling, please don’t tell me you’ve found yourself another little human to play with!”  
  
Carmilla rolls her eyes and glares at her. “Do you need me to save you from big red over there? Because all you have to do it ask.”  
  
“Carm,” is all Laura says in return. Her voice sounds shaky and it reminds Carmilla of when she cried during her panic attack. She immediately turns completely serious. “Laura?” She asks, still not getting a response. “Laura, are you okay?”  
  
There’s still no response but she does hear a annoyingly familiar voice shouting in the background. _Well, at least she’s not alone. Not that it seems like big red is doing a great job over there._  
  
“Laura,” Carmilla tries again, using that soft voice she only ever uses when she’s with Laura. “Give the phone to Danny for me, baby. Can you do that?”  
  
Carmilla hears some shuffling noises and next thing she knows a loud voice is shouting into her ear. “Hello!”  
  
“Danny.” It actually physically pains her to call the girl by her actual name. _The things I’m willing to do for my cupcake._  
  
“Carmilla, what the hell?” Danny answers.  
  
“What the hell is going on there, red? Are you with Laura?”  
  
Danny sighs. “Yes, she’s here. I don’t know, she just got up and ran.”  
  
“Well, it doesn’t sound like she’s okay at all.”  
  
“Yes, I know she’s not okay. I’m not an idiot!” Danny shouts into her ear and it takes all of Carmilla’s strength to keep herself calm.  
  
“Are you with her? Can you hold her or something?” She grimaces.  
  
“No, she’s not letting me in.” Danny sighs.  
  
Carmilla walks over to grab her jacket from her bed. “Are you still at the cinema?”  
  
“Yes-“ Carmilla hangs up on her, having all of the information she needs.  
  
She turns around to face a baffled Mattie. “Damn, Sis. I haven’t seen you this concerned about anyone in, well, forever.”  
  
“She’s special.” Carmilla smiles at her. “Just wait here or whatever, I’ll be back.” She is out the door and outside of the building within seconds, running towards the cinema at superhuman speed. She knows she should be more careful but she honestly couldn’t care less if she tried right now. _Laura needs me.  
  
  
  
  
  
_**Laura POV**  
  
_“So, what now?” One of the angry men wearing masks asks. He’s carrying a bag which now holds most of the relatively expensive things belonging to Laura’s parents. “We should just shoot her, she saw too much.” The other one answers. Laura buries herself even deeper in the blanket she's pulled around herself, peeking over the top so she can see what’s happening. “What about the kid?” Angry man number one asks, pointing in Laura’s direction. Angry man number two shrugs. “She looks terrified and she’s like eight years old, I doubt she’ll be able to describe us.” Laura’s wide eyes search for her mom's, a little relief washing over her when she's able to make eye contact with her. That relief is incredibly short lived, however, when angry man number one points a gun at her mom’s head. “Any last words, Miss?” He shrugs when angry man number two smacks him across the head. “What? I’m just trying to be humane.” He laughs. “I love you, Laura!” Her mom cries and Laura completely freezes when the man pulls the trigger, shooting her mom in the head. She wants to look away, she wants to look away so bad but she can’t get herself to move. Laura watches both men making their escape through the window before she sinks against the wall, her vision turning completely black.  
  
_ “Laura,” a soft voice comes from behind her. Laura opens her eyes and it takes her a few seconds to recognize her surroundings. “Laura, it’s me. It’s Carmilla.” Laura takes a deep breath. _Carmilla.  
  
_ “Laura, can you open the door for me?” Laura swallows, she’s not sure if she will be able to move yet and her entire body is still heavily shaking.  
  
“You can do it, baby. Just open the door, it’s okay.”  
  
Laura stabilizes herself against the door and slowly gets up, her vision is still blurry and it takes her a few seconds before she's able to stand without needing something to hold her up. She slowly turns around and unlocks the door, softly pushing it open. Carmilla’s arms immediately find her, tightly wrapping around her waist and holding her close.  
  
“You’re okay, baby.” Carmilla whispers into her ear, her hands slowly trailing up and down her back. “You’re safe, I’ve got you.”  
  
  
  
  
**Carmilla POV**  
  
“Ehm, so..” Danny awkwardly clears her throat next to them. “I brought your backpack. I’m sorry, Laura. I had no idea the sound of gun shots would still affect you this much. I just thought it would be a good movie to write our essays on.”  
  
Carmilla turns her head towards the redhead. “You did what?!” She shouts. Mentally smacking herself in the face when Laura stiffens at the sound. She pulls her closer, rubbing soothing patterns into her back. “You seriously took Laura to see a movie involving guns and you didn’t expect her to not be okay with it?” She whispers. “Did Laura even know what the movie would be about?” She glares at her.  
  
“I’m sorry!” Danny looks down. “I honestly didn’t think of it, I probably should have known better.” She sighs. “In my defense, I only found out Laura didn't do her research when we were already seated.”  
  
Carmilla sighs. There’s nothing she would like to do more right now than torturing the redhead for being so inconsiderate but she knows that might not be her best move. _You’re lucky Laura cares about you, fucking beanstake._ She snatches the backpack out of Danny’s hands.  
  
“I’m sure Laura will forgive you.” She glares at her.  
  
“Come on, cupcake.” She whispers into Laura’s ear. “Let’s get out of here.” She picks Laura up bridal style and Laura wraps her arms around her shoulders, nuzzling her nose into Carmilla’s neck. She starts walking towards the door, turning her head when she hears the redhead following behind them. “Bye, Danny.” She says, sending one last glare towards the guilty looking girl. _Good. At least she feels bad about it._  
  
Carmilla carries Laura over to the park across from the cinema, figuring now might not be the best moment for Laura to meet her sister just yet. She sits down against a tree next to the small lake, still holding Laura in her arms. She smiles when the blonde looks up at her, finally meeting her eyes again. Carmilla reaches over to tug a strand of hair behind her ear and lets out a breath of relief when Laura chuckles at her.  
  
“You feeling better?” She asks, her thumb softly tracing the blonde’s cheek.  
  
“Not great yet, but way better than before.” Laura smiles up at her. “Thank you for coming, I don’t really know why I called you.” She looks down, a shy smile covering her face. “You were just the first person I thought about, I guess.”  
  
Carmilla bends her head down to press a soft kiss on Laura’s cheek. “I’m glad you did.”  
  
Laura frowns. “Wait, did you walk all the way over here? That must have taken you at least twenty minutes!” She pouts. “I’m sorry, Carm.”  
  
“Don't worry about it, cupcake.” Carmilla snorts. “I’m kind of a fast walker.”  
  
Laura narrows her eyes at the brunette. “What’s so funny?”  
  
“Nothing, cupcake.” She smiles down at her. “Just an inside joke.”  
  
“You seem to have a lot of those.”  
  
“Yeah, well.” Carmilla shrugs.  
  
“So, listen. There’s kind of someone that you’re about to meet.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, please let me know what you think!  
> The next chapter might be a little later than usual because of the holidays but no worries, more is definitely on its way.


	8. Sink Into Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: There's sexual content and a mention of a panic attack in this chapter.

“So, listen. There’s kind of someone that you’re about to meet.”  
  
Laura looks up at Carmilla, raising an eyebrow at the nervous look on the brunette’s face. “Who's that?”  
  
“Her name is Mattie, she’s my s-“ Carmilla clears her throat. “A friend. She’s my friend.”  
  
“So you weren’t lying when you told me you do have friends.” Laura chuckles. “What’s with this whole nervous thing you have going on right now?” She asks, making a gesture with her arms.  
  
Carmilla narrows her eyes at the blonde. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, cupcake.”  
  
“Sure you don’t.” Laura laughs at her. “What? Is she like some ex-girlfriend or something?”  
  
Carmilla just frowns at her. “No, she’s..” she sighs. “It’s just complicated, okay.”  
  
“Why?” Laura asks, turning a little more serious at the obvious discomfort of the girl.  
  
“Doesn’t matter.” Carmilla groans at the eye roll she receives. “All that matters right now is that she’s currently waiting for me in our room.” She fidgets with her hands. “If she didn’t decide to take off yet, that is.”  
  
Laura sighs. She’s obviously not going to get any more information out of the brunette. “Alright.” She stands up, reaching her hand out to Carmilla. “Let’s go meet that friend of yours.”  
  
  
  
  
  
Laura makes her way inside of their dorm room, closely following behind Carmilla.  
  
“Well it’s about time, kitty cat.” A unfamiliar voice sounds coming from the kitchen. “I was just starting to think I’d have to wait yet another decade for your return.”  
  
A tall woman comes walking out of the kitchen and Laura has to swallow a few times at the sight of her. She has flawless dark skin and a bone structure to die for, that last part kind of reminds her of Carmilla in a way. The woman has dark long hair, full red lips and Laura isn’t sure she has ever met someone who moves around as graciously as she is. She’s beautiful in a very intimidating kind of way which, again, reminds her of the brunette.  
  
“Well don’t just stand there, darling. Introduce me to your little friend.” The woman speaks, her voice sounding even more intimidating than she looks.  
  
Carmilla shakes her head, looking like she just got dragged out of her thoughts.  
  
“Mattie, Laura.” She gestures between the two. “Cupcake, this is Mattie who I just told you about.” She grabs a cup holding some kind of red liquid out of Mattie’s hand, taking a sip.  
  
“Hi Mattie! It’s nice to meet you. I’m Laura, Laura Hollis.” Laura reaches out her hand, mentally scolding herself for the high pitched way her voice just came out.  
  
Mattie just raises an eyebrow at Laura and slowly walks over to the girl. She walks around her, taking a stray of Laura’s hair into her hand before slowly letting go again.  
  
Laura frowns at her, quickly taking a step away from the woman.  
  
“Well isn’t she just a little ball of cuteness.” Mattie winks at Carmilla. “I can see where your interest for this one comes from.” She takes a step towards Laura again, deeply breathing in through her nose. “I can smell it, too.”  
  
Laura frowns again. She knows the woman is speaking English but honestly she may as well be speaking Chinese right now, she has no idea what this very intimidating person is talking about.  
  
“Mattie!” Carmilla glares at the woman. “Don’t.” she hisses.  
  
“Oh, I see..” Mattie lets out the most condescending laugh Laura has ever heard. “Well, at least it seems like you finally decided to learn from your mistakes.”  
  
Laura feels like she’s in some kind of twilight zone. “Anyone wants some hot cocoa?” She squeaks. “I’m going to make some hot cocoa!” She quickly makes her way towards the kitchen, not even waiting for a response.  
  
Laura can hear Carmilla whispering something to Mattie and she focuses to try and hear what they’re saying but she can’t make it out. _Figures, of course Carmilla would have the rudest friends ever._ She rolls her eyes at herself. Honestly, what did she expect?  
  
Loud laughter belonging to the dark skinned woman sounds from the other room and it sends a shiver down Laura’s spine. She quietly walks over to the open kitchen door, making sure she’s still completely out of sight.  
  
“Instead of wasting your time on a little infatuation that’s obviously never going to have a happy ending!” Mattie whispers. Laura furrows her brow, she didn’t catch anything said before this but she’s pretty sure they’re talking about her.  
  
“You don’t know that!” Carmilla angrily whispers back. “I feel like there might be a chance she would actually understand, Mattie.”  
  
Mattie loudly laughs again. “Understand?” she snorts. “She can never understand, darling. You can’t possibly understand unless you live it! She’s just some innocent little girl and I guarantee you she will run for the hills, don’t fool yourself.”

Carmilla sighs. “You don’t know her, Mattie.”  
  
“That may be true but does the name Ell ring a bell to you because I vividly remember a situation very much like this one.”  
  
A beat. Laura’s frown deepens. _Ell? Who the hell is that._  
  
“She’s different.” Carmilla whispers, her voice breaking a little.  
  
“Somehow I feel like I have heard that before.” Mattie sighs. “Use your head, Carmilla. You’re so far into this already you haven’t even noticed your little ball of sunshine has been eavesdropping for the past two minutes.”  
  
_Shit._ Laura quickly turns around to walk back to the counter and continue making her hot cocoa, a blush creeping up on her face. _How the hell did she even know that? Is she psychic or something? I was totally out of sight!_  
  
Two familiar arms circle her waist a few seconds later and Laura sighs before softly pushing her away. She knows it’s a little childish and it wasn’t even Carmilla’s fault but she can't help feeling slightly irritated about being caught.  
  
“Did you want some hot cocoa as well?” Laura turns around. “Or do you want to keep drinking that weird blood coloured drink I didn’t even know we had?”  
  
“I’m fine, cupcake.” Carmilla sighs. “Thanks.”  
  
Laura turns around again. She may have used the hot cocoa as an excuse to get out of the room but she may be slightly addicted and the thought of hot cocoa sounds heavenly right about now. Her stomach rumbles just as she finishes that thought, reminding her that she still hasn’t eaten anything.  
  
“So..” Carmilla takes a step towards Laura again, softly resting her hand on the girl’s shoulder. “Mattie and I are going out for a while, will you be okay by yourself?”  
  
Laura rolls her eyes, remembering what she just overheard. “I’ll be fine, Carmilla.” She takes the brunette’s hand off of her shoulder. “I may just be some innocent little girl but I don’t need a babysitter.” She sneers, making sure to emphasize the words Mattie just said about her.  
  
“Cupcake..” Carmilla sighs, taking another step forward so she’s standing next to Laura but not reaching out to touch her this time. “I was just making sure because of what happened before. I know you are fine by yourself.  
  
_Wow._ Laura’s eyes widen slightly. This whole Mattie situation completely made her forget about her panic attack. She turns her head to smile at Carmilla, feeling a little bad about her outburst. “I’ll be fine, Carm.” She rolls her eyes at the unconvinced expression on the brunette’s face. “Really.” She turns towards the brunette and reaches over to wrap her arms around her waist, pressing a soft kiss against her cheek.  
  
Carmilla smirks at her. “Also, don't worry about what she said. You were anything but innocent with your fingers buried deep inside of me.” She wiggles her eyebrows at a gaping Laura and winks at her before turning around and walking out of the kitchen.  
  
  
  
  
It’s been hours and Carmilla still hasn’t come back to their room. Laura was kind of glad she left at first, it gave her some much needed space to think about the things she overheard. She finally ate some breakfast, if you can even still call it that when it’s almost dinner time, and took her laptop to her bed to catch up on some of her favourite tv shows. It didn’t take long for her thoughts to take over however and Laura feels like she might go a little insane if Carmilla doesn’t come back to distract her soon.  
  
 She decides to distract herself by cleaning the room and reorganising the clothes in her closet. Carmilla might be the hottest roommate she could have ever wished for but her manners and especially her disregard for anything that has to do with cleaning leaves a lot to the imagination. Laura doesn’t think she has ever even seen Carmilla clean anything and she’s pretty sure she has pulled dark hair out of the drain about ten times by now. Laura rolls her eyes. _Honestly, we haven't even been living here for a week and this place would already be close to resembling a dump if it wasn’t for me._ She takes a mental note to propose the use of a chores wheel later. Laura makes her way to the bathroom after she’s done cleaning the entire apartment. She wasn’t even planning to take a shower tonight but she really needs to keep herself distracted and the thought of hot water washing away today's mess doesn’t sound bad at all.  
  
  
  
  
Laura has just finished brushing her wet hair and walks out of the bathroom wearing a towel when the door swings open and a sort of wild looking Carmilla finally enters the room. There’s a hole in the skin tight black top she’s wearing and Laura is pretty sure that wasn’t there a couple of hours ago. She gulps when Carmilla just stands there staring at her with a raised eyebrow, dark eyes looking her up and down. _Her eyes almost look completely black and is it just me or do her lips look redder than ever?_ Laura’s eyes widen. “Oh my god, Carm! Are you bleeding?” __  
  
Carmilla frowns for a second before quickly wiping her mouth on the sleeve of her red plaid flannel. “It’s nothing.” The brunette bites her bottom lip, eyes drifting over Laura’s body once again. “Come here.” She says, her voice so deep it almost sounds animalistic.  
  
Laura feels herself walking over to the girl before her mind has time to catch up with her. She has only taken a few steps when Carmilla surges forward and rips the towel from Laura’s body, both hands immediately grabbing Laura’s head and pushing their lips together in the most heated kiss the blonde has ever experienced. Carmilla’s lips are all over her mouth, biting at her lips and sucking on her tongue while firm hands land on her bare ass, harshly pulling them together.  
  
Laura feels slightly dizzy when the brunette pulls back from her mouth and she has to take a few deep breaths to keep her shaky legs from crumbling underneath her.  
  
“Carm,” she moans when the brunette starts nibbling and sucking on her neck. She slightly bends her neck to give the girl more access. “Not that I’m complaining or anything,” she hisses when sharp teeth bite down on her pulse point. “But any reason you're jumping me like you’ve been starving for weeks and I’m the first cookie you've stumbled upon?” She mentally rolls her eyes at herself. _Really, Hollis? Who thinks about cookies when a hot girl is kissing you senseless?_  
  
“I want you,” Carmilla says, her voice dripping with desire. “I want you so bad.”

Laura moans and the brunette captures her lips again. Tongues find each other and Carmilla pushes her weight against Laura's body, walking her backwards until the back of her knees is pressed against her bed. Laura feels her own wetness already starting to drip down her legs and she reaches over to push Carmilla’s flannel off before quickly pulling the black top over her head.  
  
Her hands make their way to the waistband of her leather pants next and she’s just about to undo the button when Carmilla’s hand covers her own, stopping her movements. Laura looks up to frown at her but it immediately turns into a squeak when she’s pushed on top of the bed, the back of her head landing on the mattress.  
  
“Not today, cupcake.” Carmilla smirks at the confused expression on Laura’s face. “Today is all about you.” She says while getting on the bed and crawling until she’s cowering over the blonde. She bends her head down, flicking the tip of her tongue over Laura’s nipple before closing her lips around it and sucking the stiff peak inside of her mouth. Laura lets out a guttural moan when sharp teeth bite down on her nipple. She slightly flinches at the few seconds of pain before a warm tongue soothes it, sending a spark of pleasure through her body and making her crotch pulsate with need.  
  
“Carm.. fuck.” Another moan escapes her when Carmilla repeats the movements on her other nipple. She grabs the brunette’s head, pulling her up for a deep messy kiss. She licks into the brunette’s mouth, biting down on her bottom lip causing the girl to moan into her mouth. Carmilla slightly pulls away so that her mouth is lingering above Laura’s swollen lips and locks her eyes with the blonde. “Sit on my face.” She breathes.  
  
Laura’s entire face goes red and her eyes widen. She’s pretty sure this is the hottest thing anyone has ever said to her and she feels her entire body catching on fire when Carmilla drags her index finger through her wet folds before pulling it away again. She moans and her hips immediately buck upwards, her pussy aching to be touched again.

Carmilla places a kiss on her lips before rolling over so that she’s laying down next to her. Laura sits up, turns around and throws one of her legs over the brunette so that she’s straddling her. She shyly looks down at her, not really sure of what to do next, and she gulps when she’s met with completely blown pupils intensely staring back at her. Carmilla moves her finger in a come hither motion and Laura slowly crawls towards the brunette’s head.  
  
Carmilla firmly grabs her ass when she’s in reaching distance, pulling her closer until her wet dripping entrance is hovering right above the girl's lips. Laura looks down at her, biting her bottom lip when she notices the girl licking her lips and dragging her eyes all over her private parts.  
  
Carmilla reaches her face upwards, sticking out a flattened tongue and slowly licks up from her entrance to her folds until the tip of her tongue flicks over the blonde’s clit. Laura lets out a soft moan at the sensation, grabbing the headboard with both of her hands to keep herself stable.  
  
Carmilla starts licking and sucking at her folds, shifting between slow long licks with a flattened tongue and quick flicks with the tip of her tongue against the blonde's clit, leaving Laura panting above her. She pushes the tip of her tongue inside of Laura’s entrance while pressing her nose against the girl’s clit and Laura feels like her insides are about to explode when the brunette’s tongue starts thrusting in and out of her with a steady rhythm.  
  
“Carm.. fuck.” Laura pants, moaning loudly when the brunette’s nose hits her clit just right. “I’m not sure if I’m able to hold myself up for much longer.”  
  
Carmilla pulls away for a second to look up and make eye contact with her. “Then don’t.” She breathes. “I want to drown in you, baby.”  
  
Carmilla’s hands tightly grip Laura's ass and pull her down against her mouth. She starts licking and sucking at her folds again, the tip of her tongue thrusting in and out of her entrance every once in a while and Laura screams when she harshly sucks at her clit while slapping her ass at the same time.  
  
She starts grinding down on Carmilla’s face and she wonders if the brunette is still able to breathe but that thought is gone as soon as it came when Carmilla repeats her last movements, sucking at her clit and slapping her ass once again.  
  
“Fuck, Carm.” Her voice is completely ragged at this point. “I’m gonna come, oh fuck!”  
  
She’s furiously grinding down on Carmilla’s face at this point, any previous shame or shyness completely gone. Carmilla lightly bites down on her clit before soothing it with her tongue and Laura is hit with the most intense orgasm of her life. Her hips keeps grinding down while her vision becomes incredibly blurry and she’s not sure if it’s possible but she’s definitely seeing some kind of stars right now.  
  
Carmilla keeps licking and sucking, careful to not touch her oversensitive clit while Laura comes down from her orgasm. She lifts her hips when her legs start shaking and she uses all of her remaining energy to scoot over until her face is level with Carmilla’s. Laura lays down on top of her and licks a trail across Carmilla's bottom lip before meeting the brunette’s tongue for a soft sloppy kiss. She whimpers when she tastes herself on the girl’s tongue and wraps her arms around her head.  
  
“Are you sure you don’t want me to return the favour?” Laura asks when they break apart, desperate for some air to fill her lungs.  
  
Carmilla just nods at her before wrapping her arms around the blonde’s waist and pulling her closer. She reaches over to pull the blanket on top of them and kisses the tip of Laura’s nose when the girl nuzzles into the crook of her neck.  
  
They silently lay like that for a few minutes, just breathing each other in and waiting for Laura’s heartbeat to return back to normal.  
  
Laura trails her fingertips up Carmilla’s upper arm and smiles when the brunette takes her hand, intertwining their fingers.  
  
“God, Carm.” Laura breathes, smiling down at her. “What in the world did you have for dinner?”  
  
Carmilla snorts. “Believe me, you don’t want to know.”

Laura sighs. “As much as I enjoyed this,” she tilts her head up a little so she can make eye contact with the brunette. “And believe me, I really did.”  
  
Carmilla smirks. “Really, cupcake? I didn’t notice.”  
  
Laura playfully rolls her eyes at the girl. “I really do want to talk about what I overheard today. I’ve been repeating it over and over in my head and I feel like I might go insane if you don’t give me some answers.”  
  
Carmilla sighs. “I know.” She tightens her arms around Laura’s waist. “Tomorrow.”

Laura smiles at her before nuzzling her nose back into the crook of Carmilla’s neck. She closes her eyes and lets out a content sigh.  
  
“Tomorrow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think! I've been loving reading all of your comments so far.  
> You can find me on  
> [Tumblr](http://www.recklessbian.tumblr.com/) and on  
> [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/stonenstewart).


	9. Fill My Broken Lungs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mention of violence.

Laura is jolted awake when the loud sound of her phone’s alarm blasts through the room. She groans loudly, it feels like she has only had about four hours of sleep which is definitely not enough for the girl to be able to fully function. Carmilla lets out a very similar sounding groan next to her before grasping Laura’s yellow pillow and burying her face underneath it, obviously trying to block out the noise. Laura pats around the mattress until she finds her phone lying on top of their still intertwined legs. She quickly turns it off, a sigh of relief escaping her when silence fills the room once more before a frown covers her face. _When did I even set my alarm?_ She shrugs, taking a mental note to thank whatever god is responsible for her alarm mysteriously going off so she won’t be late for her first class of the year.  
  
“I fucking hate alarms.” A muffled voice comes from underneath the yellow pillow. “And why the hell does yours sound like a bloody fire alarm?”  
  
“I just want to make sure it actually wakes me up!” Laura chuckles at the groan she gets in response. “Also, did you set my alarm? I’m pretty sure I didn’t think about that last night.”

Carmilla’s head peaks out from underneath the pillow. “Just making sure you won’t be late on your first day, cupcake.” She smirks at the blonde. “You strike me as the type of person who would rather have the world end than be late on your first day.”  
  
Laura wants to roll her eyes but honestly, the brunette is kind of right. _That would be so embarrassing, not to mention incredibly unprofessional._ She slowly sits up to get out of bed and narrows her eyes at Carmilla who just pulls the blanket back on top of herself.  
  
“Don’t you have to get up as well?” Laura asks.  
  
“Why would I?” She sighs, moving her head out from underneath the pillow and burying her face on top of it instead.  
  
“I wonder why anyone would get up on a Monday morning.” Laura mocks the girl. “To attend your classes of course, sleepyhead.”  
  
Carmilla snorts. “I’ll pass.”  
  
“You’re seriously going to skip class on your first day?” Laura’s eyes widen at the girl. She rolls her eyes when a deep sigh is all she gets in return. “Suit yourself, I’m going to take a shower.”  
  
  
  
  
  
Laura gets out of the bathroom about 30 minutes later. She’s dressed in her favourite pair of jeans with a grey Silas’ University sweater on top. She’s a little surprised when she finds Carmilla indeed still lying in bed, looking like she doesn’t intend to get up any time soon. _So she was serious about skipping her first day of classes?_ Laura rolls her eyes at herself. _Of course she was._ She walks over to the kitchen to grab a muffin out of the cabinet before making her way over to Carmilla’s bed and sitting down next to the girl.  
  
“Carm, get up.” She softly shakes the brunette’s shoulder while taking a bite off her blueberry muffin.  
  
Carmilla groans. “Leave me alone, cupcake. There’s no way I’m attending classes today so you can just stop your little mission before you even start it.”  
  
“As much as I would like for you to just get up and get ready for your first class of the year like every other student around here,” she sighs. “That’s not actually why I want you to get up.”  
  
Carmilla slowly sits up, eyeing the other girl. She sighs when Laura doesn’t appear like she will give her an explanation any time soon. “Just spit it out, cutie.”  
  
Laura looks down at her hands, a light blush creeping up on her face. “Okay,” she takes a deep breath. “I know it’s way too early for this but you promised to give me some answers today and honestly I don’t think I will be able to concentrate on any of my classes today if you don’t give me at least some of them right now.”  
  
Carmilla groans while dramatically letting her back fall against the wall, pulling her legs up in front of her. “What do you want to know?”

Laura feels relief washing over her. “Everything.”  
  
“Everything?” Carmilla snorts. “I’m afraid you won’t even be on time for your last class of the day if I were to tell you everything right now.” She sighs at the frown she receives. “Could you try to be a little more specific, please?”

The wheels in Laura’s head start turning. There’s so much she wants to know and she has so many questions, she has no idea where to start. She mentally repeats the conversation she overheard yesterday and quickly makes a decision on where to begin, she only has about an hour until she has to leave for class after all.  
  
“Who is Ell?”  
  
Carmilla’s face falls at that but the girl is quick to school her features back to normal. “Well, you sure know how to get right into the touchy subjects.” She sighs at the unamused look she receives. “She’s the first girl I ever fell in love with, it was a long time ago.”  
  
Laura frowns. “So why did Mattie compare me to her? I think she said something about this situation being similar to the one you had with her, whatever that means.”  
  
“I told her the truth about me and she ran away as fast as humanly possible.” A sad smile covers her face. “Just like you will.”  
  
Laura takes a deep breath, trying to keep her upcoming anger under control. “You know, I’m getting really tired of you just deciding how I will react to things.” Her voice softens when she notices Carmilla’s eyes are slightly glazed over. “Listen, I don’t know what happened or what kind of world shattering secrets you’re keeping but I promise I can handle it. I’m a big girl.”  
  
“I wouldn’t be so sure about that, Laura.” She fidgets with her hands. “I promise you all of the scenarios I’m sure your beautiful brain has come up with at this point aren’t even half as bad as the things I would tell you.”   
  
Laura sighs. “Well, you being a possible murderer has definitely crossed my mind a few times and I reckon it can’t get much worse than that.” She swallows at the unconvinced expression on the brunette’s face. “Right?” she adds.  
  
“What if it is?” Carmilla locks her eyes with Laura’s. “Worse than that, I mean.” She shakes her head at the widened eyes staring back at her. “What if I told you a lot of people are dead because of me and there isn't even a reason to justify my actions?” A few angry tears escape from her eyes. “Not a good one, that is.” She adds.  
  
Laura shakes her head at the brunette. “You couldn’t, Carm. You’re not a bad person.”  
  
“That’s where you’re wrong, cupcake.” Carmilla smiles at her but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “I am a bad person, I’ve told you this before.” She swallows. “Some would even argue I’m not a person at all. More like a monster.”  
  
Laura lets out a shaky breath, a few tears sliding down her cheeks. “You’re not a monster, Carmilla.” She reaches out to cover the girl’s knee with her hand, giving it a soft squeeze. “You may have done some bad things, hell you may even have done a lot of them.” She smiles at the brunette. “That doesn’t make you a monster. Someone who is able to touch me the way you have could never be.”

More tears start to escape Carmilla’s eyes. “This is exactly why I can’t tell you, Laura.” She shakes her head at herself. “You think so highly of me and I’m not sure I could survive your big loving eyes turning into hateful ones.” She places her hand on top of Laura’s. “I think I would rather die.”  
  
“Carm, please just tell me.” Laura has to swallow a few times at the intense eyes burning into her own. “I know we only really started talking to each other about two weeks ago and I know that’s probably way too short for you to trust me with something like this. It’s just, I’ve never felt this way about anyone in my life. I know that may not mean that much to you since I had never even slept with anyone before you but I know how I feel. Just because I’m eighteen years old and you seem to think I’m some innocent little girl doesn’t mean I will run away as soon as you do or say something I don’t understand or agree with.”  
  
Laura takes a deep breath before continuing her ramble. “I was eight years old when I watched my mom getting shot in the head by some men who thought the little possessions she owned were worth more than her life. I had to watch my dad losing the will to live after that. I have been through things too, Carm. I know what it's like to walk around with guilt eating away at you and I know you could tell me anything in the world and I promise you I won’t run away from it.”  
  
Carmilla is sobbing at this point and the way she’s curled up against her own legs closely resembles a frightened child. Laura reaches out to wipe a few tears away with her thumb before softly grabbing her chin to make the brunette look up at her.  
  
“Okay.” Carmilla mumbles.  
  
Laura’s eyes widen. “What?” she asks, not quite believing what she’s hearing.  
  
“Okay.” Carmilla repeats, her voice a little louder this time. “I’ll tell you.” She places her hand over the one resting on her chin, softly squeezing it before letting go again. “But I’m going to need you to be completely open minded about this. I know what I’m about to tell you will make you think I’m either crazy or straight up lying at first but I promise you I’m telling you nothing but the truth.”

Laura furiously nods at her. She knows she’s been begging the girl to tell her the truth but now that Carmilla has actually agreed she can’t help feeling extremely nervous about what she’s about to hear. The brunette seems to read her mind when she reaches out to rub a few calming circles on her back. “I’m aware that what I’m about to tell you is very likely to completely shock you and you have every right to react but please promise me to wait until I have finished telling you the whole story.”  
  
Carmilla pulls her hand back again and stretches her legs out in front of her, hands coming down to rest on her lap.  
  
“I promise.” Laura whispers.  
  
“Please don’t end up hating me.” A sad voice escapes from Carmilla’s lips, the words spoken so softly Laura wonders if she was meant to hear them.

“You know me as Carmilla but I was born as Mircalla.” Carmilla swallows and closes her eyes. “In 1680.” She softly adds.

A huge frown takes over Laura’s face and honestly she’s about to get angry at the brunette when she remember what she just promised her. _Just hear her out, save your anger for later._  
  
“When I was eighteen I attended a ball where I was murdered.” Carmilla continues, making Laura about ten times as confused as she already was. “I woke up a few hours later in the most pain I had ever experienced. A very powerful looking woman was sitting next to me, she didn’t say much at first.”  
  
Laura opens her mouth but immediately closes it again when she receives a glare.  
  
“She later introduced herself as my new sort of mother figure, it's hard to explain.” Carmilla swallows again. “She’s the one who turned me.”  
  
Laura just keeps frowning at the brunette, she knows Carmilla promised to tell the truth but none of this is making any sense to her.  
  
Carmilla sighs and her intense gaze focuses on the blonde. “I’m a vampire, Laura.”  
  
Laura just stares at her for a few minutes, her mouth hanging wide open. _A vampire? That’s can’t possibly be true, can it? Vampires don’t exist. They’re just weird creatures made up to scare children, right?_ She looks up to be faced with a completely serious looking Carmilla. _Unless they do exist and those stories aren’t as fictional as everyone assumes they are._ Laura’s eyes widen when all of the weird little things she witnessed these past two weeks fall into place. The weird conversation she overheard between Carmilla and Mattie, the animalistic qualities the girl seems to have, the red liquid she was drinking, the red liquid that was covering her lips last night. It all makes so much more sense.  _Oh my god. Oh my god, the girl of my dreams is a vampire._  
  
“So, how old are you exactly?” Laura squeaks. Her throat feels a little tight and she has to swallow a few times before she feels like she’s able to breathe in a normal way again.  
  
Carmilla’s brow furrows for a few seconds before the smallest smile covers her lips. “Technically, I’m 336 years old. I was turned at eighteen, though”  
  
Laura’s eyes widen at that. She already figured the girl would be really old if she was born in 1680 but hearing the actual number out loud makes it all the more real. “And you-” she clears her throat before continuing. “You drink human blood?”

Carmilla just nods.  
  
“The blood I noticed covering your lips last night, it wasn’t your own?” Laura takes a deep breath. “Do you actually kill people for their blood?” She’s trying really hard to make sure her voice comes out somewhat composed but she’s pretty sure it sounds about three octaves higher as usual at this point.  
  
Carmilla shakes her head and takes a deep breath. “Not always,” she sighs. “Not anymore, that is. I mostly just keep myself alive with blood bags but I do occasionally drink from the source, so to speak.” She chuckles at Laura who is clearly trying to look more relaxed than she’s currently feeling. “That usually only happens when I need the extra strength or when I’m just incredibly pissed off.”  
  
Laura nods at her, trying her hardest to understand. “Do you feel bad about it?”  
  
Carmilla shrugs. “I know you probably think I should, but I don’t really. I always make sure to choose a bad person to drink from like a rapist or some kind of abuser.” She lets out a shaky breath. “I do feel bad about all of the innocent lives I took in my early days, though.”  
  
Laura breathes a sigh of relief. She knows any other person would probably be horrified at this point but it does make her feel a lot better that Carmilla doesn’t just randomly chooses her victims. Honestly it baffles her how calm she still is under these circumstances, her mind should be screaming at her to get out of here as quick as she can but she is a hundred percent certain Carmilla would never hurt her.  
  
“So, when you told me your parents died..” Laura looks back up at her.  
  
“I meant the parents I knew after dead.” She snorts. “Well, I watched my biologic parents die as well but honestly they got what they deserved.”  
  
“But your second parents were vampires as well, right? How did they die?” Laura has already gotten over the biggest shock and right now the wheels in her head are turning with all of the questions she wants to ask the girl. She quickly takes a look at her phone to see what time it is and lets out a sigh of relief when she learns she still has thirty minutes left. There’s no way she would be able to leave right now.

Carmilla reaches over to grab her packet of cigarettes lying on the nightstand. “May I?” she asks.  
  
Usually Laura wouldn’t even think of allowing the girl to smoke in their room but she nods at her, understanding that sharing all of this information is probably making the brunette desperate for a smoke. “At least those can’t kill you.” She jokes.  
  
Carmilla snorts. “Honestly, cupcake. Are you sure you’re okay? You’re being way too calm about this and I’m starting to worry if you’ve gone into some kind of shock.” She lights her cigarette and takes a long drag before placing the packet back on the nightstand.

“Oh, I’m definitely shocked.” Laura smiles at her. “But I’m also extremely interested so please try to relax a little, the thought of running for the hills hasn’t even crossed my mind yet.”  
  
A genuine smile takes over Carmilla’s features and she shakes her head at the blonde. “You are the most ridiculously beautiful person I have ever met.”  
  
“Well, that’s quite the compliment. I imagine you’ve met a lot of people over the years.” She jokes before her expression turns serious again. “So, your parents?”  
  
Carmilla sighs. “I met Ell about 150 years ago and I fell completely head over heels in love with her. I was a hundred percent certain we were soulmates and so after a while I decided to tell her the truth.” Carmilla swallows. “She believed me to be a monster and ran out of the room before I even had the time to finish my story.” A stray tear escapes from her eyes. “She decided to tell the entire village about it. No one believed her, of course. Still, there are vampires out there who are way more powerful than I am and they were anything but happy about some human spreading all of these stories.”  
  
Carmilla angrily wipes her tears away and takes another deep drag from her cigarette. “They paid me and my family a visit, on Christmas of all days, and murdered my parents and little brother right in front of me.” Laura gasps at the information. “They wanted to punish me and the best way for them to do that was to take everything I had away from me.” Carmilla’s voice comes out incredibly shaky. “They locked me inside of a coffin filled with blood afterwards, told me I would have all the time in the world to think about the choices I made.”  
  
Laura’s eyes widen and she surges forward, wrapping her arms around the brunette’s waist and pulling her against her body. “I am so sorry, Carm.” She sobs. Carmilla’s fear of the dark makes so much more sense to her now and it makes her feel even worse about locking her inside of that closet.  
  
“It’s okay, baby.” Carmilla’s grip tightens on Laura’s sweater and she buries her face into the girl's neck. “The parents I knew after death weren’t the best people either, if you can even still call us that. They made me do a lot of things I didn’t want to do but still, they were everything I had back then. My brother was different, though. He was turned a couple of decades after me and we ended up becoming best friends.” She breathes into Laura’s neck. “You can’t imagine what it feels like to be sealed inside of a dark coffin for more than 70 years while not being able to die. All I could do was drown in the images of William being murdered over and over. It was rough. I felt like I was going absolutely insane.”  
  
“I think every other person would have done just that.” Laura sighs, placing a soft kiss on the brunette’s tear-stained cheek. “I thought I had it bad when my dad locked me inside of my room at night for safety purposes.” She jokes.  
  
Carmilla snorts. “Your dad sounds delightful.”  
  
“He’s not that bad,” Laura smiles down at her. “He was just absolutely terrified of losing me as well after mom died. I think I was the only reason for him to stay alive and not just end it to go after her.”  
  
Carmilla lets go of the blonde and sits up, her expression turning completely serious again. “Laura.. you know I would never even think of hurting you, right?” She reaches out, her thumb tracing soft circles on Laura’s cheek. “I don’t think I could bear the thought of you being afraid of me.”  
  
Laura places her hand on top of Carmilla’s and pulls it towards her own lips, placing a soft kiss on each of her knuckles. “I’m not afraid of you, Carm.” She sighs against the girl’s fingers. “In fact, I don’t think anyone has ever made me feel as safe as you do.”  
  
Laura smiles at herself. It’s true, she has only officially met this strangely wonderful creature about two weeks ago and she’s already convinced she would do just about everything for her. Her obvious attachment should probably terrify the hell out of her but it just makes her feel incredibly safe instead.  She takes a look at her phone to find out what time it is and frowns.  
  
“I only have five minutes left and please know that this conversation is far from over,” she rolls her eyes at the dramatic groan she gets in response. “Can you please tell me what happened last night?” she blushes. “Not that I’m complaining or anything, it’s just you came in here looking like some wild animal and there was blood all over your mouth..”

Carmilla smiles. “Yeah. So you should probably know that Mattie is a vampire as well..”  
  
Laura raises an eyebrow at the girl. “You don’t say.”  
  
“Observant as ever.” Carmilla smirks. “Well, let’s just say her warning me and comparing you to Ell didn’t really do my mood any good.” She sighs. “Mattie has never really been into the whole blood bag thing. Let’s just say she’s a little more.. old school.”  
  
“Just tell me, Carm.” Laura rolls her eyes again. “You literally just told me you’re a vampire, I doubt what happened last night will be able to top that.”  
  
Carmilla chuckles at her. “We ended up having a few drinks straight from the source, so to speak.” She looks down at her hands, an almost shy look taking over her features. “Overindulging on blood tends to increase my urges..” She looks up again, smirking at the blush still covering Laura’s cheeks. “The choice between jumping you or picking a surely losing fight with Mattie was pretty easy to make.”  
  
Laura snorts. “I’m glad I could be of assistance.”  
  
Carmilla just shakes her head at the girl and bends forward to place a few soft kisses on her lips, lightly biting down on her bottom lip before letting go again. “You’re going to be late for your precious class if you don’t get your lovely ass out of here right now, cupcake.”  
  
“Oh my god! Yes. Classes!” Laura’s eyes widen and she pretty much jumps out of bed. “I have to leave! I swear to god if you’re not here when I get back tonight I will go on a vampire hunt.” She quickly walks over to her own bed to grab her jacket and the backpack she already filled with everything she’ll need last night.  
  
Carmilla just shakes her head and drops back down on her bed. “I wouldn’t doubt that for a second.”  
  
Laura’s hand is already resting on the doorknob when she turns around to take one last look at the brunette. “Hey, Carm?”  
  
Carmilla just grunts in response.  
  
“See, I’m still here. I told you I would be.”  
  
“You are.” Carmilla gives her a soft smile. “Though I’m not sure if that’s because your mind still hasn’t processed all of this or if you’re an actual gift sent to me from the heavens.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo.. Carmilla finally told her! I decided to keep some parts from her original story and add/change other things myself. Please let me know what you think, I love reading all of your comments.  
> You can find me on  
> [Tumblr](http://www.recklessbian.tumblr.com/) and on  
> [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/stonenstewart).


	10. Under Your Spell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait compared to what you're used from me! I've been very busy these past few days. The bad news is this chapter is the shortest one yet. The good news is I will post the longest chapter so far next. This is kind of a fill up chapter for what is coming next. Anyway, hope you enjoy!
> 
> Edit: As some of you may have noticed, this fic is temporary on hold. I promise I will finish it so no worries, I'm just dealing with some personal stuff right now. You can still come talk to me on tumblr or twitter and I will continue this one as soon as possible.

Laura makes it to her first class, English literature, just in time. She quickly walks up the steps to take a seat in the back where Danny is awkwardly waving at her. She completely forgot about what happened at the cinema the other day and she is immediately hit with guilt when she realizes Danny must have thought she was angry at her all this time. She takes a seat at the desk next to Danny and gets her notebook and pencils out before turning towards the redhead.  
  
“Hey, Hollis.” Danny gives her a small smile. “Listen, about the other day..”  
  
Laura is quick to cut her off. “It’s fine, Danny. It wasn’t your fault, I’m not mad at you.” She smiles at the unconvinced expression on the girl’s face. “Really.”  
  
“Still, I’m really sorry Laura. I should have been way more considerate and when you didn’t text me back afterwards I was pretty sure you were angry at me.” She breathes out a sigh of relief. “Which would have totally been justified.” She adds.  
  
“Danny, I know you. You’re one of my best friends and I know you would never do something like that on purpose. I promise I forgave you as soon as it happened.”  
  
Danny’s face falls a little but she’s so quick to school it back to normal, Laura isn’t even sure if she saw it right. They smile at each other before both turning their heads to the front where their professor has just started talking.  
  
Laura thought having a conversation with Carmilla before going to class would help her to be able to focus on classes today but honestly she’s pretty sure she is left with even more questions instead. _Okay, so your girlfriend is a vampire._ Laura rolls her eyes at herself. _She’s not your girlfriend, Hollis! Your friend. Your friend is a vampire._ Laura sighs, friend doesn’t sound right either. _What kind of friends have sex with each other? Maybe friends with benefits is the best description for now._ The blonde shakes her head at herself. _Why do I even need to call it anything? Let’s just call her Carmilla. Carmilla is a vampire._  
  
Laura tries to focus on her professor for a few minutes but her thoughts are quick to take over again. _So, what do we know? Carmilla is more than 300 years old, which should probably bother me way more than it does._ The part about the brunette feeding on people bothers her a little more but it’s for a totally different reason than it probably should be. Laura feels a weird kind of anger boiling up inside of her at the thought of the brunette’s lips covering someone else’s throat and she mentally scolds herself. _When did I start thinking like this?_ She shakes her head, finally accepting that she won’t be able to participate in class today. Instead she tears out a page from her notebook and starts writing down all of the questions she wants to ask the girl tonight.  
  
  
  
  
  
**Carmilla POV**  
  
Carmilla keeps lying in bed for about an hour and a half after Laura has left, she's unable to go back to sleep though. She still can’t believe how the blonde reacted to the truth and it’s starting to make her feel even more anxious than she already was. _How is she this calm about all of this?_ She sighs, burying her face deep in Laura’s yellow pillow and inhaling the girl’s scent. _God, she smells so good._ A small smile covers her lips. _If she smells this good, I wonder what she would taste like.._ The vampire smacks herself in the head as soon as that thought goes through her mind. _No, no, no. Don’t you even think about it._  
  
She groans and sits up to get out of bed, not liking where her thoughts are going at all. She walks over to the kitchen and grabs a blood bag out of the box in the fridge she had been hiding them in. _Well, at least that won’t be necessary anymore._ She takes a few sips, slightly scrunching up her nose at the taste. It’s been over a hundred years since she started using these and she’s still not quite used to the taste, especially so soon after drinking straight from the source. She imagines this is what humans feel like when they order a burger at some crappy diner a day after eating at a 5 star restaurant.  
  
Carmilla walks over to the bathroom to take a quick shower and lies back down on her bed with one of her favourite books afterwards. She wasn’t kidding about not going to classes today. In fact, she’s not planning on going to any of them except for her art classes. _Why the hell should I even attend history classes? I lived it._ She rolls her eyes. She doubts any of these so called professors would be able to tell her anything she doesn’t know already. Honestly the only reason she’s even here is because of the woman who teaches the art classes, she’s brilliant. At first Carmilla had only planned to sign up for those classes but of course that’s not how it works because humans just love their little rules and complications. In the end she just decided to sign up for other classes as well but don’t think for a second she intends to go to any of them.  
  
She decides to put her book away again when Laura’s features start appearing on the pages. _I suppose I won’t be able to do any reading today._ She rolls her eyes at herself. _As if I haven’t read this book about twenty times already._ She sits up on her bed and reaches underneath it to grab the box she has been hiding from Laura. Finding out Laura was a virgin had been a very pleasant surprise, mostly because of the incredibly jealous and slightly possessive side vampires possess. Still, while all of this incredibly vanilla sex has been more than pleasant, Carmilla is starting to feel herself getting desperate for a little more adventure in the bedroom so to speak.  
  
She opens the box, taking out a few of the many toys and other fun objects she keeps in it. Carmilla eyes the objects lying on her bed and she’s embarrassed to admit she can already feel heat coursing through her body at the thought of using them on Laura. She supposes it would be best to start off with the less scary looking ones and build her way from there, the cupcake is still very pure after all. She decides on one of her favourite strap-on dildo’s and a pair of still very innocent looking handcuffs. She smirks down at the items. _Has the cupcake ever even used a vibrator before?_ She rolls her eyes. _Honestly, I doubt it._  
  


Carmilla closes the box again and places it back underneath her bed. She knows she promised Laura to tell her more about her extremely painful past tonight but she really can’t keep her mind from planning way less PG things to fill their time with. Sex just isn’t the same when you spend half of the time trying to keep your fangs from coming out followed by desperately trying to hide them when they do. She snorts. _Let’s be honest, with Laura they always do._ She just can’t wait to finally not have to think about that anymore and maybe the cupcake will even give them some attention. She takes a deep breath at the thought, to say her fangs are a sensitive spot would be an understatement.  
  
She makes her way back to the kitchen to grab another blood bag, figuring it's probably a good idea to drink more than enough blood to make sure any thoughts having to do with biting stay as far away from her mind as possible.  
  
  
  
  
Carmilla has just finished a spontaneous abstract painting she started a few hours ago when she remembers Laura should be back any time now. She carefully places the painting next to the window so it can dry and uses her superhuman speed to quickly change out of her paint splattered clothes and into a pair of the sexiest lingerie she owns. It’s a red lace thong that barely covers any skin at all and the same colour bra that honest to god makes her cleavage look like her boobs were created by the gods themselves. She raises an approving eyebrow at herself in the mirror when she’s done. Carmilla isn’t the type to be overly arrogant about her appearance but let’s face it, she’s hot. _One of the upsides about being a vampire._ She smirks when she hears the door open in the other room and uses her vampire speed once again to make sure she’s sitting down on the edge of her bed before Laura has closed the door and turned around.  
  
Laura’s eyed widen as soon as they notice the brunette and Carmilla smirks when she almost drops her backpack.  
  
“Oh, hello cupcake. I didn’t see you there.” She says, her voice completely innocent as if she didn’t plan all of this for hours.  
  
Laura just opens and closes her mouth a few times before that familiar blush creeps up on her cheeks again. _God, how is it even possible for such a tiny human to blush this much?_  
  
“You alright there, cupcake?” Carmilla smirks again at the glare she receives.  
  
“I thought we were going to talk.” Laura squeaks, forcing her eyes away from the brunette’s body and down to the floor only to peak up again a few seconds later.  
  
“Then talk, cutie.” Carmilla says, patting her hand on the bed beside her.  
  
“Seriously?” Laura sighs. “I can’t possibly concentrate like this!”  
  
“What? You want me to look less appealing or something?” Carmilla raises an eyebrow at the hopeful look covering the blonde’s face. “Where would be the fun in that? Besides, it was just a little hot in here so I decided to relieve myself from all of these clothes. It's not my fault you can't resist me, cutie.”  
  
“Seriously? I’m not stupid! I know exactly what little mission you have apparently planned out!” Laura rolls her eyes when a smug look is all she gets in response.

“Oh, don’t fool yourself.” Carmilla says, standing up and slowly walking over to the blonde until she’s standing right in front of her. “You haven’t seen anything yet.” She whispers.  
  
Laura bites her own bottom lip, clearly using all of her strength not to jump the brunette. “I really want to talk, Carm.” She looks up, finding already dilated pupils staring back at her.  
  
Carmilla lets her hand wander underneath the blonde’s sweater, fingers drawing a circle around her belly button before making their way up towards her chest.  
  
“Personally, I find the idea of a conversation sound much more appealing after a few mind blowing orgasms.” She harshly cups Laura’s breast before firmly flicking her thumb over the blonde's nipple. “But whatever you want, cupcake.” She winks at the blonde, taking her hand back and slowly turning around to walk back towards her bed while making sure her hips sway in the most erotic way possible.  
  
She smirks when she hears the tiny groan coming from behind her. _So easy.._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please let me know any of your thoughts. Advice and comments are greatly appreciated. Also make sure to look out for a new really long chapter after this one.  
> You can find me on  
> [Tumblr](http://www.recklessbian.tumblr.com/) and on  
> [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/stonenstewart).


End file.
